THE PUTT
The four ball are playing the fifth hole – amazingly all four have hit the green and it is J2T to putt,
He is only 30 feet from the hole so asks for the flag to be removed and settles over the ball, Feet slightly apart, knees slightly bent he surveys the route to the hole then looks back down at the ball, The left leg starts to shake, quite gently at first, then as the moment for the stroke approaches, much more vigourously such that his body shape blurs to that of a shaking jelly, One more look at the hole then head down , head very still and putter slowly back and through the ball,
The ball is on its way, morning dew gently arcs into the sunlight giving off tiny rainbows of colour, Pace and direction look good , and the ball bobbles and bounces on the unevenness of the green – but J2T has already made allowance for this,
Off to his right wanna buy is discussing his latest purchase from ebay with dont move, Its the new G2000, he says, its got the new fuckikama mid/regular/stiff shaft with ultra mid/low/high kick point and moulded in superlight carbon fibre as used by the maclaren racing team, It comes with the standard jumbo grip which brings back fond memories of massaging the old chap in the old days,
Back on the green J2T has not moved, the ball is on target rolling contentedly on its journey, the dynarod logo rotating majestically, still some 20 feet from the hole,
The serenity of the scene is interupted by the sewage system cranking into action, activated by the imminent arrival of the fat controller's morning evacuation, Virtually blocking the pipes it has already sucked all the water from the toilets in the appartments, together with a cat and a small dog, and a plumpish lady who had the misfortune of being positioned on the toilet seat, at the time, is now in possession of an external gastric ring which will take 2 hours for the pompiers to remove,
Back on the green J2T still hasn't moved, he is as if frozen in time, leg now unmoving and head bent as if in prayer, 10 feet to go, taking the anticipated borrow, slowing on the upslope and looking good for an entry in the birdie book,
So bad has already made his birdie, the 5th of the day, and is making his way to the 6th - a hole he really can't play these days,
Wanna buy is still in full flow – the shaft is longer than the C5 but shorter than the RN21, The 460cc head is no longer a 2 stroke but the new green low energy version with a very special 95 degree loft, The idea he explains is that you tee off facing away from the hole and loop the ball over your head with maximum top spin – turning a fade into a draw and vice versa, Not bad for 3 euros 25 !!
Back on the green the ball is making its final approach and J2T has finally lifted his head, His hazel brown eyes bore into the back of the ball which has but 6 inches left for the honour of an entry in the birdie book, The hole is slightly crowned on the left side but J2T spotted this from30 feet and has made the necessary allowances – or has he ? Will the ball went and went away ?
Final couple of inches now – looking good - pace and direction good – birdie book beckoning – but wait,
J2T has not allowed for the fact that the big V teed off before him and all the effort is in vain as the ball drops into a size 10 footprint 2 inches deep,
Eric