Sunday School Lesson Dr. Gary Berry; Pastor

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Sunday School Lesson Dr. Gary Berry; Pastor

July 14, 2013 Liberty Baptist Church

Charlotte, North Carolina

The Science of the Christian Life

The Science of Mystique

Ephesians 5:28-33

Introduction

Ø  In these verses about marriage, the Lord uses the phrase “This is a great mystery.”

Ø  This chapter is going to refer to any relationship that we have, but will refer mostly to the marriage relationship.

Ø  This is an area that causes most of the problems that we have in marriage.

I. What is a Mystery?

A. While watching a sporting event, if the score gets one sided; most people will leave the game, Why?

1. Because the mystery is gone, they know how the game is going to turn out.

2. When the mystery is gone, the interest goes with it.

I Corinthians 15:51 Behold, I shew you a mystery; we shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed,

I Corinthians 15:52 In a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trump: for the trumpet shall sound, and the dead shall be raised incorruptible, and we shall be changed.

I Corinthians 15:53 For this corruptible must put on incorruption, and this mortal must put on immortality.

Matthew 13:11 He answered and said unto them, because it is given unto you to know the mysteries of the kingdom of heaven, but to them it is not given.

B. The word mystery means to get a sample of something, but not to get all of the something.

C. God gives us a little sample of the “Second Coming” and the Rapture, but He withholds some things about it.

1. A mystery is something with a little withheld.

2. It is something leaving you wanting more.

3. It is something that is a marvel because it is something which is new all of the time.

4. It means that there is more to explore.

D. When God speaks of the mystery of the kingdom, He follows it with parables that give us a little taste of it without explaining it all together.

E. The samples they give out in the grocery store is to give you enough of a taste to make you want more.

1. The samples they give you in the grocery store are to give you enough to taste to make you want more.

2. It is never meant to fill you up, that is the mystery.

3. That is what the Bible is, it is an appetizer that gives you a little taste that you never had before.

4. Every time you read it something new jumps out at you.

F. Sometimes in our marriages we take too much and destroy the mystery. When there is nothing left to explore the mystery is gone.

G. This is why there is such a mystery with homosexuality in our country.

1. When man has nothing left to explore about women, he begins to need to explore something else, so he explores men.

H. Someone once said to Bro Hyles, “Bro Hyles, I love you dearly; I wish I knew you better.”

1. That is the way it ought to be in any relationship. That is what causes “Mystique.”

2. We get too close to people and get sick of them instead of wanting more of them. Wanting more is healthy.

II. Several observations regarding the matter of “Mystique in Marriage.”

A. Men, your wife should still be the woman you dated, and the wives, your husband the man you dated.

1. Men, you were in awe of her then, there was something about her that made you want more.

2. It is because she reserved something that left you wanting more.

3. Men destroy marriages by wanting too much of their wives all of the time.

4. You should never get to the place where there is no more ground to explore.

B. She should be more than you wife, and he should be more than your husband.

1. Men, you should live two lives, one should be with what she was, and the other should be what she is.

2. A wife should strive to be both what she was and what she is.

3. It is what you were, wives, that made him want what you are, and men, it was what you were that made her want what you are.

4. Every day should be a small scale version of you courtship and marriage.

5. The way to stay in love is to keep recapturing that which you both were when you first fell in love.

I Peter 3:6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.

6. Sarah called Abraham “lord”, which mean leader. Were they not close? Yes, but Abraham kept the mystique by not continuing to be what they were before they were married.

C. Do this with your person.

1. Intimacy is good, but intimacy is won by being what you used to be when you were intimate the first time.

2. Husbands and wives ought not to run around the house dressed in their under clothing.

3. There ought to be the same manners within the marriage that were present when you were dating.

4. When you get married, do not quit doing all of the things you did when you were dating.

5. Have times when you go back to being to each other what you were when you were dating.

6. We ought to keep trying to look our best for each other.

D. Do this with your personality.

1. We ought to work as hard to charm the people we know well as we do those we meet for the first time.

2. It is a sad fact that we treat strangers with more respect than we do our closest friends.

3. Husbands and wives ought to work at having winning personalities just as they did when they were dating.

4. The only way for this to happen, is for there to be times when they are not as familiar with one another.

E. This means you must constantly be growing.

1. Relationships grow because people grow.

2. Every relationship is enhanced by fresh thoughts and ideas.

3. We must continue to grow in order to keep the mystique within the relationship.

4. Keeping interests apart from each other, keeps the relationship fresh.

5. If we do to much together, we forfeit the opportunity for personal growth.

6. People are attracted to each other by the mystique of what they know. Then they get to close and quit growing.

7. We live in a generation today that has more entertainment then we do interests.

8. When we are not interesting, we cannot build relationships with the mystique needed to make them strong.

F. Be a little formal.

1. Do not allow yourself to become so close to someone that you lose all the formality that you had when you first interested in each other.

2. That formality is what made you close. I you lose the formality you will lose the closeness as well.

G. Keep yourself a little hungry

1. Ant time two people get to familiar; they lose the hunger they had for one another in the beginning.

2. Remember Mystique is that which never gives more than a sampling of one’s self, thus leaving others to desire more.

3. We have allowed the world’s influence to tear at the fabric of our relationships.

4. Nothing is sacred in this world, and, as a result, all of he mystery has vanished.

5. This is why we have the problems of pornography, people committing adultery, and homosexuality.

6. This is why people are exploring those things which are forbidden by God, There is no mystery left.

Conclusion

v  God’s people must learn that we cannot lose the mystique in our relationships, lest we lose everything that caused us to want that relationship in the first place.

v  This is the way we once believed in our nation, and we were better for it.

v  Be careful in all your relationships, especially in your family relationships, that you apply these principles and that you practice the “Science of Mystique.”