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Summary of Important Points from the Self-Forgiveness

Journal Article

Dr. Brian Campbell

Abstract
Self-Forgiveness: The Stepchild of Forgiveness Research
Although research on interpersonal forgiveness is burgeoning, there is little conceptual or empirical scholarship on self-forgiveness. To stimulant research on this topic, a conceptual analysis of self-forgiveness is offered in which self-forgiveness is defined and distinguished from interpersonal forgiveness and pseudo-self-forgiveness. The conditions under which self-forgiveness is appropriate also identified. A theoretical model describing the processes involved in self-forgiveness following the perpetration of an interpersonal transgression is outlined and the proposed emotional, self-cognitive, and offense-related determinants of self-forgiveness are described. The limitations of the model and its implications for future research are explored.

Conceptual analysis:

  • Self-forgiveness is defined and distinguished from interpersonal forgiveness and pseudo self-forgiveness.
  • Conditions under which self-forgiveness is appropriate are identified.
  • Theoretical model is given describing the processes involved in self-forgiveness (after someone has perpetrated a transgression).
  • The emotional, social-cognitive, and offense-related determinants of self-forgiveness are described.

Limitations of the model and its implications for future research are explored.

  • Recent surge on research regarding interpersonal forgiveness.
  • Intrapersonal [self-forgiveness] has received remarkably little attention.

Various definitions of self-forgiveness are explored.

  • Self-forgiveness: a willingness to abandon self-resentment in the face of one’s own acknowledged objective wrong, while fostering compassion, generosity, and love towards oneself. [Enright, 1996, p. 115]

Shared features of self-forgiveness and interpersonal forgiveness:

  • Both unfold over time
  • Both require objective wrong which the offender is not entitled to forgiveness but is granted forgiveness nonetheless.
  • Both forms of forgiveness do not condone the behavior.
  • Both require a conscious effort that does not occur unintentionally.

Distinctions between interpersonal and intrapersonal forgiveness:

  • Although interpersonal forgiveness is unconditional, self-forgiveness need not be.
  • One may set up a condition such that self is only forgiven if he or she continues to meet these conditions.
  • Self-forgiveness often entails a resolution to change and to behave differently in the future.
  • Interpersonal forgiveness does not imply reconciliation with the offender, whereas reconciliation with the self is necessary in self-forgiveness.
  • Choosing not to forgive self can often have more severe consequences than those associated with a lack of interpersonal forgiveness.
  • It is impossible to escape the situation by avoiding the transgressor as one might do in the case of interpersonal transgressions.

To date, no one has studied the consequences of self-unforgiveness and interpersonal-unforgiveness.

How are the two processes related? Is one a necessary precondition for the other?

  • It has been suggested self-forgiveness facilitates interpersonal forgiveness by allowing one to identify with one’s offender.
  • It is been argued that interpersonal forgiveness is more authentic and meaningful when it follows self-forgiveness.
  • There is no empirical evidence regarding the relationship between self-forgiveness and interpersonal forgiveness and there is limited evidence on the association between the two constructs would suggest they are unrelated or weekly related.

Self-forgiveness involves forgiving oneself for injury to another person or to oneself.

  • Self-forgiveness can apply to situations in which the only victim of one’s behavior is the self.

True self-forgivenessversus pseudo self-forgiveness:

  • Pseudo self-forgiveness occurs when an offender fails to acknowledge wrongdoing and accept responsibility. In such a situation, one may indicate that one has forgiven oneself when, in fact, one does not believe one did anything wrong.
  • Guilt and regret must be fully experienced before one can move toward self-forgiveness.
  • Attempts to forgive oneself, without cognitively and emotionally processing the transgression and its consequences, are likely to lead to denial, suppression, or pseudo self-forgiveness.
  • True self-forgiveness is a long and arduous process that requires much self-examination and may be very uncomfortable.
  • Pseudo self-forgiveness can be achieved by self-deception and/or rationalization.

Is self-forgiveness always appropriate?

  • Self-forgiveness is only appropriate if a wrongdoing actually occurred.

Is self-forgiveness appropriate if an individual has committed a heinous offense, such as rape or murder?

  • Self-forgiveness may be viewed as a sign of disrespect toward the victim. Therefore, it may only be effective or appropriate after the offender is granted forgiveness by the victim.

Emotional determinants of self-forgiveness:

  • Guilt
  • Shame: associated with focus on self.

Social-cognitive determinants of self-forgiveness:

Attributions

Offense-related determinants of self-forgiveness:

  • Conciliatory behavior. The extent to which an offender apologizes and seeks forgiveness for a transgression is positively associated with the victim’s level of intrapersonal forgiveness.
  • Perceived forgiveness from victim or a higher power.
  • Severity of the offense

Limitations of the model:

  • Model doesn’t attempt to be a comprehensive model of self-forgiveness.