Full file at
Chapter 2
SELF-AWARENESS: A POINT OF DEPARTURE
Total Class Time Required: 75 to 90 minutes
In order to improve interpersonal skills, students need to know as much as they can about themselves. The more students know about themselves, the better they will understand how they’re perceived by others and why others respond to them the way they do. To the degree this examination indicates things students don’t like about themselves or that are hindering their interpersonal effectiveness, they may want to change certain things about themselves. But nothing in this chapter is meant to suggest they need to change. Its contents are designed only to help students gain expanded insights into themselves.
This chapter provides students with insights into their values and assumptions about people, their interpersonal needs, their assertiveness levels, and their interpersonal styles, or habits of relating to others. The following instruments are included:
Self-Assessment Exercise: Assessing Your Self-Awareness
This is a 30-item instrument that helps students to see how self-aware they are. Point out that the questionnaire is simply a list of behaviors that are related to self-awareness—the more of these behaviors students exhibit, the more knowledge they have about themselves before reading the text. Also, stress that because the numbers on the scale are reversed, the higher the student’s score, the lower the level of self-awareness. Students who score more than 90 will want to create a plan for improving their self-awareness. Because the assessment relies on self-report, students may also want to ask someone who knows them well to fill out the assessment about the student, and compare answers.
SAQ 1: Learning Style
TIPS 6/e includes descriptive information to help students interpret this brief learning style questionnaire.The most important message you can give your students is that there are no right or wrong answers.No one learning style is better than the others.The purpose of the instrument is to give students insight to what aspects of the learning cycle they may be most comfortable with or prefer.It is helpful to remind students that once they are equipped with this information about themselves, they can work to develop skills associated with other learning styles. This will round out their strengths and help them grow in their appreciation for different ways of learning.Doers can teach themselves to watch a bit more, thinkers can take action to test ideas, and so on.
SAQ 2: Interpersonal Questionnaire (FIRO-B)
This is a widely used test that generates six separate scores. It assesses expressed desire to give and wanted desire to receive three interpersonal needs: inclusion, control, and affection. Scores in the six areas range between 0 and 9. The total interpersonal needs score is the sum of all six. National standards are provided for comparison. Although it is generally true that high scores are associated with outgoing personalities and shy people tend to score low, there is no right answer. Effective managers can be outgoing or reserved.
Detailed FIRO-B Interpretation Information
Inclusion. Has to do with forming new relations and associating with people, and determines the extent of contact and prominence a person seeks.
- Expressed Inclusion: How much do I connect with others in activities of ideas?
- Wanted Inclusion: How much do I want togetherness or to be part of a network?
Control. Has to do with decision making, influence, and persuasion among people, and determines the extent of power or dominance a person seeks.
- Expressed Control: How much do I take charge, directly or indirectly?
- Wanted Control: How much do I want others to be “in the driver’s seat”?
Affection. Has to do with emotional ties and warm connections among people, and determines the extent of closeness a person seeks.
- Expressed Affection: How much do I share myself with others?
- Wanted Affection: How much do I want others to reach out to me?
Total Expressed Score. Indicates how much you act toward others to get what you need. In general, it shows how comfortable you are in taking action or being proactive.
Total Wanted Score. Indicates how much you rely on others to get what you need. In general, it shows how comfortable you are being reactive or responsive.
Total Expressed and Total Wanted Scores. Best interpreted in relation to one another, because they explain the general pattern of how you go about satisfying interpersonal needs. When Wanted needs are equal to Expressed needs, you may be cautious about expressing a behavior before you are sure how the person will respond.
Total Need for Inclusion and Total Need for Control. When both are low it indicates you are indifferent to satisfying this need.
Individual Cells
0–2low: the behaviors are rarely displayed by you
3–6medium: the behaviors will be a noticeable characteristic of you but only some of the time
7–9high: the behaviors are noticeably characteristics of you in most situations.
Expressed Inclusion:How much do I connect with others in activities of ideas?(medium)
Wanted Inclusion:How much do I want to be part of a network?
(low)
Expressed Control:How much do I take charge, directly or indirectly?(low)
Wanted Control:How much do I want others to be “in the driver’s seat”?(medium)
Expressed Affection:How much do I share myself with others?(medium)
Wanted Affection:How much do I want others to reach out to me?(medium)
When scores are in the medium range you are much more selective and deliberate in how you vary your patterns across different situations and are probably more flexible and dependent on the particular people or the situation.
Extreme scores indicate a reliance on certain behavior patterns and would represent behavior or actions in most situations.
SAQ 3: Assertiveness Questionnaire
This test evaluates the student’s degree of assertiveness in terms of the emphasis he or she gives to passive, aggressive, and assertive behaviors. Again, the intention of this instrument is to help students learn about themselves and see how others are likely to perceive and react to them.
SAQ 4: The Big Five Locator Questionnaire
This test gives information about five fundamental personality characteristics:
Adjustment. Rates a person’s overall emotional stability. People with high adjustment scores are generally calm and stable, even in turbulent situations.
Extroversion. Rates the extent to which a person gains energy from being around other people, as opposed to introverts, who gain energy by withdrawing inside themselves.
Agreeableness. Rates the extent to which a person is willing to accommodate the requests of others—how cooperative they are likely to be.
Conscientiousness. Rates the extent to which a person can be depended upon to complete work commitments.
Openness to experience. Rates the extent to which a person likes being exposed to new things.
Once the students have received their test results, ask them to compare these results with the results of the other tests that appear in the text, particularly the test for Cognitive Style (results should correspond to results on Extroversion and Openness) and the FIRO-B (results should correspond with the results on Extroversion, and possibly Agreeableness.)
SAQ 5: Cognitive Style
The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator is widely used in organizations today. It is likely that your students will have encountered this test before in another setting. When discussing the Myers-Briggs, as well as other personality instruments, it is important to point out to students that just because they test as having a personal characteristic, it does not mean that the characteristic they have will dominate their behavior at all times. Again, stress that there are no right or wrong answers to these tests—they simply provide information that can be used to get a better picture of one’s preferences and tendencies.
When helping students to understand their assessment results, be sure to direct them to Exhibit 2.4: Characteristics of Different Cognitive Styles. This figure describes the various personality characteristics associated with each combination of results, as opposed to interpreting the individual cognitive styles on their own.
BEHAVIORAL STYLE FLEXIBILITY ACTION PLAN
Write out your answers to the following questions about someone with whom you are not getting along with well. Implement your written action plan and report back to the class how your new interaction with the person succeeded.
1.My regular approach has not been very successful with this important person (spouse, friend, coworker, prospect):
2.In my opinion this person’s behavioral style is:
3.This person probably reacts to my style as follows:
4.To improve my relationship with this person, I could modify my behavior by:
5.My specific action plan for my next meeting with this person will be:
The Self-Awareness Profile
Many students know themselves and have an accurate understanding of how others perceive them. But many others really don’t know themselves at all or are largely unaware of how others view them. Those who already know themselves well aren’t likely to get much from developing this Self-Awareness Profile. But for those students who have never taken the time to reflect on who they are and what makes them tick, or for those who believe friends and associates “don’t know the real me,” the profile is likely to give them quite a bit of insight into the underlying ways they behave and how others see them.
Summarizing Self-Awareness Results
It is very important students not be threatened by their results. There should be no sense of competition to see who got the highest or lowest scores on the SAQ instruments. But knowing their own scores and the overall make-up of the class can provide valuable learning. This occurs through obtaining feedback. So take the time to have students anonymously turn in their Summary Sheets of their individual scores and then aggregate those scores. The following Class Summary can be used to present the scores to the class for analysis and discussion.
After tabulating the scores, present them to the class to examine on the board, handouts, or an overhead transparency. Possible questions for class discussion might include:
- What kind of interpersonal values, needs, and styles dominate this class?
- How much variance is there within the class?
- Do the aggregate scores confirm your image of students at this college? How about in your major area of study?
- Do any of the scores surprise you? Why?
- What are the implications of these scores for this class?
CLASS SUMMARY
SAQ 1: Learning Style
Learning Style / Number of StudentsDiverging
Assimilating
Converging
Accommodating
Total Students
SAQ 2: Total Interpersonal Needs (FIRO-B)
Low------Need to Interact with Others------High0–13 / 14–27 / 28–41 / 42–54
SAQ 3: Assertiveness Level
SCORE / 6–10 / 11–14 / 15–19 / 20–24Passive
Aggressive
Assertive
SAQ 4: Big Five Personality Characteristics
SCORE / 35–44 / 45–54 / 55–65ADJUSTMENT / Resilient / Responsive / Reactive
SOCIABILITY / Introvert / Ambivert / Extrovert
OPENNESS / Preserver / Moderate / Explorer
AGREEABLENESS / Challenger / Negotiator / Adapter
CONSCIENTIOUSNESS / Flexible / Balanced / Focused
SAQ 5: Cognitive Style
Extrovert / IntrovertSensing / Intuition
Thinking / Feeling
Judging / Perceiving
Class Activities
1.Have students turn in Summary Sheets.
2.Establish groups with a maximum of 5 members. Give them up to 40 minutes to do either Group Exercise 1 or Group Exercise 2. These exercises are designed to allow students to meet several class members, to learn something about each, and to become familiar with the group orientation they’ll be using throughout the course. While these groups are in progress, aggregate the scores on the students’ Summary Sheets (see previous section).
3.Reconvene the entire class. Put results from Summary Sheets on the board or overhead transparency projector. Lead the discussion.
Total time: 60 to 75 minutes.
Suggested References
Alessandra, T. and M. J. O’Connor. The Platinum Rule: Relationship Strategies for Getting What You Want by Giving Others What They Want. New York: Warner Books, 1996.
Alessandra, T. and M. J. O’Connor. Behavioral Profiles: Self-Assessment. San Diego: Pfeiffer & Company, 1994.
Bowen, D. D. “Toward a Viable Concept of Assertiveness,” in D. T. Hall, D. D. Bowen, R. J. Lewicki, and F. S. Hall, (eds.), Experiences in Management and Organizational Behavior, 2nd ed. New York: John Wiley & Sons, 1982, pp. 414–417.
Mcgregor, D. The Human Side of Enterprise. New York: McGraw-Hill, 1960.
Schutz, W. C. FIRO:A Three-Dimensional Theory of Interpersonal Behavior. New York: Holt, Rinehart & Winston, Inc., 1958.
1