Перша п’єса
House Ghosts
People in the play
Mum Dad
Cindy Penny
Harry six ghosts
three robbers four narrators
Акт І
The four narrators walk onto the stage. They stand in the middle and look at the audience.
Narrators Welcome, welcome,
Welcome to the show!
It's a story with ghosts.
Are you scared? Yes or no?
Welcome, welcome,
Welcome to the show!
It's a story with robbers.
Are you ready? Let's go!
Narrator 1In this story there's a family with a mum and a dad and three children. The children are Penny, Cindy and Harry. They live in a big old house.
Narrator 2Today is Saturday and the children aren't at school. Every Saturday they visit their friends and play. Mum and Dad go to the shops. Then they all go to the cinema.
The narrators leave the stage. Penny, Cindy, Harry, Mum and Dad walk onto the stage.
Penny Hurray! Hurray!
Cindy and Today is Saturday.
Harry We don't go to school,
So Saturday is cool.
Mum and Hurray! Hurray!
Dad Today is Saturday.
Saturday is fine.
And now it's breakfast time!
The family sit down at the table. On the table there are bananas, apples, oranges, biscuits and slices of bread. There are also empty plates in front of the children.
Narrator 3There are ghosts in this house. They play games with the family.
Narrator 4The family can't see or hear the ghosts.
The narrators leave the stage. Six ghosts run onto the stage.
Ghosts We're the ghosts of this house.
We can talk and sing
But the people in the house
Can't hear a thing.
We're the ghosts of this house
We can jump and run
But the family in the house
Can't see ghosts. What fun!
The ghosts stand behind the children and Mum.
Mum Here's a banana for you Penny,
a banana for you Cindy and
a banana for you, Harry!
The children put the bananas on their plates.
Cindy I love bananas!
The ghost behind Cindy takes her banana and gives it to the ghost behind Penny. The ghost behind Penny puts it on her plate.
Cindy Harry, have you got my banana?
Harry No, I haven't! Look - Penny's got
your banana.
The ghost behind Cindy puts three bananas on her plate.
Dad Penny, that isn't nice. That'sCindy's banana.
Penny But Cindy's got three bananas!
Cindy Oh no, I haven't.
Harry Oh yes, you have!
The ghost behind Harry puts five bananas on his plate.
Penny But you've got five bananas, Harry.
Harry Oh no, I haven't.
Penny and Cindy look at Harry's plate.
Penny Oh yes, you have. Look!
and Cindy
DadPenny! Harry! Cindy! Stop that!Go to your bedrooms and do your homework.
Harry But it's Saturday today. Can we go to the cinema?
DadNo, you can't! Now please go toyour rooms.
The children leave the stage.
Mum Come on, dear, let's go to the shops.
Mum picks up her shopping bag and takes Dads arm. They leave the stage.
Акт ІІ
Narrators 1 and 2 walk on to the stage and move the table next to the bookcase. Then they look at the audience.
Narrator 1Now there are only ghosts inthe room. Narrator 2 But there are strange noises inthe house.
The narrators leave the stage.
Ghost 1 I can hear a noise. Ghost 2 Yes, there are strangers inthis house.
Ghost 3 Look, here they are!
Three robbers walk onto the stage.
Robbers We like holidays,
In the sun.
We robhouses,
It's great fun.
Work is terrible,
Work isn't funny.
So we rob houses,
For jewels and money.
Robber 1 The house is empty. EverySaturday the children go and play with their friends. And their mum and dad go to the shops.
Robber 2 Good, let's start!
The robbers walk around the room. They look for money. Ghosts 4, 5 and 6 walk behind the robbers. Ghosts 1, 2 and 3 stand by the bookcase.
Robber 3 Oh, look! There's a nice clock on the bookcase.
Robber 3 puts the clock in his bag.
Robber 1 There's a pretty box on the table.
Robber 1 opens the box.
Look! Money!
Robber 1 closes the box and puts it in his bag.
Ghost 1 Stop the robbers!
The ghosts throw the food from the table at the robbers.
RobbersOw! Ow! Stop! Please stop!
The ghosts stop.
Robber 1 That's strange.
Robber 2 Yes, the room is empty.
Robber 3 I think ...Yes, there are people behind the bookcase. Let's look!
The robbers start to go to the bookcase but the ghosts shake the bookcase and books fall onto the floor. The robbers stop. Then the ghosts push the robbers. The robbers fall to the ground.
Robbers Stop! Stop! Ow! Ow!
Narrators 3 and 4 come onto the stage.
Narrator 3The children can hear the robbers and the ghosts. They come into the sitting room.
Narrator 4Mum and Dad come back from the shops.
Harry, Penny and Cindy run onto the stage.
CindyWhat's that noise?
PennyLook! Who are they?
Harry They're robbers.
Mum and Dad mate onto tie stage.
Mum Look al this room! There's food on the floor, there are books on the floor... Oh. and there are people on the floor!
PennyYes. they're robbers.
Penny opens robber 3's bag.
CindyLook, Mum! Here's your clock!
Cindy opens robber 1's bag.
And this is your box, dad, with your money in it
Dad Thank you. You're brave children.
Harry Can we go to the cinema now?
Mum Of course you can!
Mum and Dad and the children, robbers, ghosts and narrators come to the front of the stage. They stand in a line and bow.
Narrators That's the end,
The end of the show.
Goodbye, goodbye,
It's time to go.
Robbers We're sorry! We're sorry!
We're very very sad.
But we're your friends now.
We aren't very bad.
All Hurray! Hurray!
Ghosts We play games
So the family is sad.
Then we help the children
So we aren't very bad.
Mum, DadThe robbers are sorry.
Penny It's a happy end.
Harry andThe ghosts are good and
Cindy We're all friends!
AllHurray! Hurray!
That's the end,
The end of the show.
Goodbye, goodbye,
It's time to go.
Goodbye, goodbye,
It's time to go!
Друга п’єса
A Day at the airport
People in the play
Mrs Black Customs officer 1
Mrs Smith Customs officer 2
Mr White Customs officer 3
Man 1 \ Man 2
Woman 1 \ Woman 2
Other passengers
At the airport. Customs. Three customs officers are behind a desk. There are a lot of passengers with suitcases.
Customs officer 1Please, come here.
Customs officer 2Queue, please. This is England.
Customs officer 1 puts up the 'queue here' sign. The passengers move into a queue. Man 1 is first in the queue, then Woman 1, then Mr White, then Mrs Smith, then Man 2, then Woman 2 and finally Mrs Black.
Customs officer 3Who's first, please? Man 1 I'm first and I'm in a hurry. Please, be quick!
Man 1 puts his suitcase on the desk.
Customs officer 1 Is this your suitcase, sir?
Man 1Yes, it is! What a silly question!
Customs officer 1What's in your suitcase, sir?
Man 1Clothes, of course! Please, hurry!
Customs officer 1OK, sir!Thank you very much. Next, please.
Man 1 walks off stage. Woman 1 puts her suitcase on the desk.
Customs officer 2Hello, madam. What have you got in your suitcase?
Woman 1I've got presents.
Customs officer 2Presents? Please, open your suitcase.
Woman 1 opens her suitcase.
Customs officer 2 What are these?
Customs officer 2 pulls out two bunches of bananas.
Woman 1They're bananas! Presents for my pet monkey!
Customs officer 2OK, madam! Thank you very much! Next, please!
Woman 1 takes her suitcase and walks offthe stage. Mr White puts his suitcase on thedesk. Customs officer 3 looks at the label onthe suitcase.
Customs officer 3Is this yoursuitcase, Mr Black?
Mr WhiteMy name isn't Black.It's White.
Customs officer 3The name here isBlack!
Mr WhiteWell, I'm not Mr Black butthat's my suitcase.
Customs officer 3Please openyour suitcase, Mr White.
Mr White opens his suitcase. Customs officer 1 pulls out a dress and ladies' shoes.
Customs officer 3Is this your dress, Mr White? Are these your shoes?
Mrs Black runs to the desk.
Mrs BlackStop! Stop! That's my dress, those are my shoes - and that's my suitcase. You've got the wrong suitcase, Mr White. Here's your suitcase!
Customs officer 3OK, Mr White and Mrs Black! Thank you very much. Next, please!
Mr White and Mrs Black walk off stage with their suitcases. Mrs Smith puts her suitcase on the desk.
Mrs SmithI'm Mrs Smith. Here's my name.
Mrs Smith points to the label on suitcase.
Customs officer 1Thank you Mrs Smith. Have you got bananas in your suitcase too?
Mrs Smith What a silly question. I've got clothes.
Customs officer 1Please open your suitcase!
Mrs Smith opens the suitcase.
Customs officersAhhhhhh!
Customs officer 1 screams and closes the case.
Mrs SmithClothes and my pet snake!
Customs officer 1Snakes! Snakes! You can't carry snakes in suitcases. Please, go to that office.
Customs officer 1 points off stage. Mrs Smith walks off stage. Man 2 puts his suitcase on the desk.
Man 2Well, I haven't got snakes, I haven't got bananas. And this is my suitcase!
Customs officer 2Ha! Ha! We're happy about that, sir. Thank you very much. Next, please!
Man 2 turns from the desk. Woman 2 runs forward and bumps into him.
Woman 2I'm next! Oops! Sorry!
Man 2 drops his suitcase and it opens. In the suitcase are money and jewels.
All Look in his suitcase!
Man 2 tries to pick up the money and jewels.The customs officers go to Man2.
Customs officer 3I can see you haven't gotbananas or snakes, sir!
Customs officer 1Come with me, please, sir.
He puts his hand on the man's arm.
Customs officer 2What a day!
All (chorus x2) Oh what a day!What a day!A day at the airport . What can we say?
PassengersThe officers are crazy.
Customs OfficersThe passengers are mad.
PassengersWe love our holidays But customs are bad!
All(chorus x2)
Customs Officers (They point at the passengers.)
Their suitcases are full. They have crazythings.
Passengers(They point at customs officers.)
They ask silly questions. They don't mean athing!
All(chorus x2)
Третя п’єса
the missing Skeleton
People in the play
Shirley Holmes George Clueless Mrs Smith
Children from Class 7a : Rosie, Sandy, Jim, Ken, Tom and Mary
Children from Class 7b : Billy ( Mrs Smith's grandson ), Boy 1,
Girl 1, Girl 2, Mr Green ( the Biology teacher )
Three narrators
Act 1
Breakfast time at Shirley Holmes's house
Narrator 1Today we're going totell you a storyabout two famous detectives, Shirley Holmesand George Clueless.
Narrator 2Shirley Holmes lives in London withher housekeeper, Mrs Smith.
Narrator 3Today Clueless is having breakfastwith Holmes.
Thedetectives and Mrs Smith turn to the audience and sing.
Clueless I'm Clueless.
Holmes I'm Holmes.
Clueless We're detectives.
and Holmes Yes, we are.
Mrs Smith And I'm Mrs Smith.
I'm the housekeeper.
Clueless I'm Clueless
Holmes I'm Holmes...
Clueless We're the stars.
and Holmes We're the stars.
When there's a robbery
What do we do?
What do we do?
We look for clues.
Clueless I'm Clueless.
Holmes I'm Holmes...
Mrs Smith I cook and wash
And sometimes clean the shoes.
Clueless I'm Clueless.
Holmes I'm Holmes...
Mrs Smith And I'm Mrs Smith.
I'm the housekeeper.
They're the stars.
Mrs SmithHere's your tea, Ms Holmes and Mr Clueless.
Holmes Oh, dear, this tea isn't sweet enough for me, Mrs Smith.
CluelessYou're right, Holmes, it isn't very sweet. And it's too hot.
Mrs Smith(angrily)Then you need some milk and sugar!
Mrs Smith pours milk and sugar (pieces of paper) over the two detectives.
HolmesMrs Smith needs glasses.
CluelessWhy do you think that?
HolmesWell, she poured the milk and sugar on us and not in the cups.
CluelessYou're a brilliant detective!
Someone knocks at the door.
Mrs SmithThere's somebody at our door!
CluelessWhy don't we open the door?
HolmesA clever suggestion, Clueless!
Mrs Smith opens the door. Rosie, Jim and Sandy walk into the room.
RosieHello, Auntie Shirley!
CluelessWho is Auntie Shirley?
Rosie walks over and kisses Holmes.
HolmesThat's me, Clueless!
CluelessThen this girl is your niece.
HolmesOh, you're a clever detective, Clueless, aren't you?
RosieYou must help us. Our class has got a big problem with Froggy Green.
CluelessFroggy Green?
JimOh, we mean Mr Green, our Biology teacher.
HolmesWhat's the problem with Mr Green, Rosie?
RosieFroggy ... Sorry! Mr Green has got a skeleton in his cupboard in the Biology classroom.
SandyYesterday in our lesson he opened the cupboard and the skeleton wasn't there.
RosieWe laughed because Mr Green often loses and forgets things.
JimMr Green thinks children from our class, Class 7a, took it, but we didn't take it. Mr Green says we can't go on the school trip next week.
SandyWe have to find the skeleton and then we can go on the school trip!
ChildrenPlease help us!
HolmesDon't worry. You will have the skeleton tomorrow.
Children(with surprise)Tomorrow?!
CluelessOf course, we're the best detectives in the world. We're the stars!
The children leave the stage. Holmes and Clueless start singing.
Clueless I'm Clueless.
Holmes I'm Holmes.
Clueless and We're detectives.
Holmes Yes, we are ...etc,
Holmes and Clueless leave the stage. There's a knock at the door. Her grandson, Billy, walks in.
BillyHi grandma!(he kisses heron the cheek). Here's an invitation for you.
Mrs SmithAn invitation?
BillyYes, it's an invitation to a play by my class. It's tonight at the school hall.
Mrs SmithOh, thank you! Are you in the play?
BillyOf course I am! You have to see it. There's a real skeleton in the play!
Mrs SmithA real skeleton? (she smiles)Yes, you're right-I have to see it.Can Ms Нolmes
and MrClueless come too?
BillyOf course they can! See you tonight grandma!
He kisses her again and runs out of the room. Mrs Smith opens the invitation and reads to herself.
Mrs SmithThe Mystery Box by Class 7b. ... The detectives have to see it! They have to find the skeleton by tomorrow, don't they?
Act II
In Mr Green's Biology classroom
Narrator 1The two detectives went to the school to look for the skeleton.
Narrator 2They went to see Mr Green in his Biology classroom.
The narrators leave the stage.There is a knock at the door.
Mr GreenCome in!
HolmesHello, Mr Green. I'm Shirley Holmes. I'm a famous detective and this is George Clueless.
Mr GreenHave I met you before? I can't remember...
CluelessNo, but we've come here to find the missing skeleton.
Clueless looks at the jars and bottles on the table. He picks up one jar.
CluelessThese are interesting! What's in here?
Clueless opens the jar. There is a loud buzzing noise.
Mr Green(shouting) Oh, it's a Big Buzz. It's an insect from Africa. Quick, catch it!
Mr Green, Clueless and Holmes dive under the table, then run around the room as if they are chasing an insect. All the time there is the buzzing noise. Then they all look at the window.
Mr GreenOh, dear, it has gone out of the window. It was my last Big Buzz. I've lost ten of them now.
HolmesOh, we're sorry but please tell us about the missing skeleton.
Mr GreenI saw the skeleton in the cupboard before the morning break. Then after the break the skeleton wasn't there.
HolmesThen somebody took it at break time.
Clueless(to the audience)What an amazing detective!
Mr GreenI think the children from Class 7a took it. They like playing jokes on me.
HolmesCould we talk to the pupils in Class 7a, please?
Mr Green(goes to the door)Yes, of course. Come inside, please!
Ken, Tom and Mary walk into the room.
CluelessAnd your names are ...?
Ken(pointing at himself, then at Tom and Mary)Ken, Tom and Mary.
CluelessWhat were you doing yesterday in the morning break, Ken?
KenI wasn't doing anything.
HolmesTom, what were you doing yesterday in the morning break?
TomI was doing nothing with Ken.
HolmesWhat were you doing in the morning break, Mary?
MaryI was with Ken and Tom ...
Holmes... doing nothing! Clueless, this is the most difficult investigation we have ever had!
Narrators walk onto the stage.
Narrator 1Holmes and Clueless talked to all the children ...
Narrator 2Then they talked to all the teachers ...
Narrator 3And finally they looked around the school to find the clues ..
singing
Mr Green My skeleton is missing.
Clueless What can we do?
and Holmes We want to find it, Mr Green.
But we haven't got a clue!
Children and You have to find the skeleton.
Mr Green Where have you been?
Clueless We're looking for it everywhere.
But it's nowhere, Mr Green!
Holmes We must find the skeleton.
Clueless What can we do?
You must find it by tomorrow.
Holmesand But we haven't got a clue!
Clueless
Act III
In the school hall
Narrator 1Holmes, Clueless, Mrs Smith and Rosie have come to see a play at the school.
Narrator 2It is a play by Class 7b.
Narrator 3Mrs Smith's grandson is in Class 7b and he's in the play.
Mrs Smith, Holmes, Clueless and Rosie come onto the stage.
SmithI'm so happy. We're going to seemy grandson in this play.