BASEBALL INTELLIGENCE: February, 2018(#77)
Father Knows BEST??!!
Parenting has been treated as if it is an inalienable right, and with this in mind we can see evidence that each and everyone wanting to be a progenitor should pass or clear some type of qualifying “hurdle”! Heavens, you have to pass a test to drive a car, fish, and even one to get married?! Parenting is a privilege and thus, should have standards of some sort...just look at how the current system is working! Nuf sed!
Over the years, child psychologists have determined that there are varying methods to raising and socializing children…and of course, the alternative, which can lead to another “Lord of the Flies”…or even Animal Farm. From helicopter parents to the much more popular achievement proxy syndrome parent(s), there is an entire array of dysfunctional approaches to rearing(not raising) children. Ideally, every parent should provide a safe and educational environment and empower their children to be good, solid, and productive citizens who may follow their dream! THEIR DREAM…not a “correction” of parent woes and misfortunes, but the opportunity to develop into who he/she wishes to be; not the dream of the parent but of the progeny! For many years, television provided some great role model dads; from Ozzie, Cliff Huxtable(not the portrayer), Sheriff Andy, Pop Cartwright, etal to Archie Bunker..oops! Now, the sitcoms have turned to sophomoric humor and little examples of decorum or guidance.
As if we needed more poor examples of parenthood to add to the Marv Marinovich, Press Maravich, Richard Williams, Joseph Kennedy, Jackie Coogan’s dad(led to national law), etal., we have a new “playa” in the PPPP..pitifully poor parenting phenomena. LaVar Bell!! This pseudo paragon of middle class morality has put the “pedal to the meddle” when it comes to not teaching the “life lessons” to his sons: Lonzo, LiAngelo, and LaMello. He has created a whole new category of parent, the “manipulative marionette” or parent-puppet master. This new title is quite unique and no one has “earned” it more than LaVar! (See attached for the other types of parents.) As he is alone in this new genre, Michael Porter’s father must be given a dis-honorable mention…carpet bagging is not as bad but he is just getting warmed up! The MM(see above) uses their children as a source of income, notoriety, and to replicate them in his/her self-image. Under the guise of modern parenting or “creative” guidance, these predators use the youngsters for their road to success and of course, $$$$. Many of the types of over-protective and controlling parents are merely pesky and meddlesome, but Ball is outright selfish and is denying his children the opportunity/option to develop as unique people and follow their own dreams.
At one time, UCLA housed the “Wizard of Westwood” and now it has nurtured the “Scourge of Westwood”. Not only has LaVar taken his children out of one of the top universities in the country, he has berated the coaches(high school/college/pro), schools, and even the President of the US. It was incredulous of him to state that LiAnglo’s theft in China was merely “boys will be boys” and then to undermine the school and government’s help in getting him released from prison. Instead of condoning the crime, he should have “parented up” and punished the young man as well. Moreover, he exploited the affair to bring light to his Big Baller Brand shoes and own personage. BTW: Better Business Bureau gave BBB an “F”!!!!
Ball’s recent actions have taken MM to a new level…having taken the youngest out of regular school as well as removing LiAngelo from UCLA in order to play “pro” basketball in Lithuania. Why not go all the way and join a Gulag? These young men have been taken out of quality schools, sunny southern California, away from their peer group to play in Lithuania? That has to be every young “baller’s” dream! One thing is for sure, they will not be able to steal sunglasses there, as the sun rarely shines and they probably are not available in stores. Most importantly, LaVar will be home schooling his two sons..good luck with that! The two Balls are not only going to be isolated in a foreign country but will no longer be eligible to play college basketball and will totally miss their young adulthood and a relatively normal socialization. It would be great to know what Plan B or even C is for the two young men? By all accounts neither is as talented as Lonzo and without the experience of playing in college or even competitive select basketball afforded in the US, their chances of playing pro ball are severely diminished. What will happen if they cannot “ball”(no pun intended) at the big time level? LaVar has limited their options and “selected” their destiny without having them develop the social and intellectual skill sets to follow their dreams and live a productive life! Even Machiavelli let his kids learn the hard way!
Parenting is one of the hardest tasks(along with marriage) as there is no hand book or manual. One must provide a safe and educational environment so children will develop the proper social skill sets, learn societal norms/mores, and encourage independent growth. Bad parenting, as listed by many psychologist/doctors, is the antithesis: Setting bad examples, using oppressive authoritarian tactics, and denying children the opportunity to learn on their own. These are factors that create a dystopian culture that produces many non-productive citizens and unhappy people. Without strong role models, solid parenting, and family love, it is not a far cry from social and political chaos. David Hume, Scot philosopher, provided great insight with his concept of zero-sum. In life, the winners take all and losers get squat! However, we need to teach our progeny how to cope with this as the greater complex lessons of life are learned in the snags and pitfalls of growing up. The manipulative marionette takes away the right of each person to learn life lessons on their own(with loving guidance) and to follow their dream! Life is like a 3-1 count in baseball and Ball has made it a “beat the buzzer” for his kids!!
“Child abuse casts a shadow the length of a lifetime” Herbert Ward