Marriage, Healthy Aspects
There are several principles of healthy marital relationships that you can use as guidelines for evaluating your own marriage. You can use them to identify strengths and to look for areas which could stand a little improving. The following is a list of ten such principles that you will want to consider as you endeavor to strengthen the cornerstone of your family life.
1. Beliefs and values of life
Couples are either ruled by convictions or circumstances. There is a need to agree on matters or expenditure of time, money and energy in the marital relationship. These shape convictions and give control over circumstances.
2. Friendships and responsibilities
The relationship needs societal interactions aimed at the betterment of people outside your own home situation. This factor reduces possessiveness and selfishness.
3. Financial considerations, money management
There is a need for a philosophy of spending and saving. A healthy marriage pays close attention to priorities and handling of all financial matters.
4. Freedom to discuss fears and dreams
The marital relationship needs both partners to express themselves and to hear and understand what the other is saying on a variety of subjects, without fear of rejection or being put down.
5. Problem solving skills
Resolving problems requires two things. First, both must be willing to forgive and apologize when wrong. Second, each partner must be willing to change when a conflict has shown them to be wrong or irresponsible.
6. Conscious attempt to reserve something of our best for each other
There is a subtle trap that we fall into when we behave, dress and share at our best for everyone but our own spouse. Set aside times and places to insure that you avoid the trap.
7. Marriage can be filled with freedom of affection and sexual experience.
Marriage relationships need a high degree of touching, holding, and sensitive experiences to meet the sexual needs of each other.
8. Positive climate of affirmation that makes each partner significant.
There is health in relationship when both partners seek ways to communicate their approval, pride, and appreciation for each other.
Attention/Affection Approval/Admiration
9. Marriage is built on a foundation of absolute trust and commitment to one another.
Trust is built over time, by the consistency of love and acceptance.
10. Partners need to care for themselves in a manner that betters their total relationship.
The way we meet our physiological needs and care for ourselves is of utmost importance. As we take care of ourselves, we are also serving our spouse. Personal hygiene, physical fitness, medications, examinations, all are important parts of marriage.
The marital relationship that provides the soundest foundation for family life is the relationship that has as its primary goal the nurture of each other and the life that is shared. To care for a marriage is to serve God in one of the highest callings possible!