Grading Sample
These comments refer to an untitled narrative paper in a past Portfolio Preview. The comments address each of my grading criteria in order. For convenience, I'll assume the writer is female.
Thought
The writer has shown us some vivid memories of the events, and that suggests that she has spent some brainstorming time attempting to recall just what happened, and she has limited her discussion to a specific event or small set of events. Why is the event meaningful to the writer? Well, it was scary, and scary events stick in our minds. Further, her last sentence tells us that she and her family learned something from the event. A large problem with thought, though, shows up in the last paragraph: this is a dog that has shown dangerous tendencies before. Readers will wonder why the family didn't take stronger precautions with the dog and whether they might not have learned a more important lesson than the one stated. Thought, then, weighs in at about 2.0.
Organization
The paper covers the events pretty much in the order that they happened, but that's about the best that can be said for organization. There is no clear thesis. Paragraphing seems haphazard--there is no instance where the writer has attempted to use a topic sentence as the controlling idea for a paragraph or to make a general statement that will control a section of the paper. 1.0 is a generous grade for organization.
Development
Without a thesis, it's hard to say that the thesis is supported or explained. We do see some ideas that might get developed, however. We see the fight between the dog and the father. We see the writer's concern for her own safety and her gratitude for her father's concern about her. We see her awareness that the dog chose not to attack her. We see the mom's heroic effort to help her husband. We see the kids' terror. We see the dad's pain. We see the writer's doubts that they'll ever again have a big dog. We see that the family has had previous bad experiences with the dog. The most fully developed section is the fight between the dog and the dad, but I count five sentences spread among paragraphs 2, 3 and 5 that refer to that. There are four one-sentence paragraphs and four with only two sentences. Short paragraphs like this are common in fiction, but they're usually an indicator of lack of development in college papers. Organization, too, earns a grade no higher than 1.0.
Language
This paper shows no evidence of concern with word choices. The writer says "scar tissue wounds" when she probably means "scar tissue." "I was so scared" is a phrase used in conversation where we can emphasize the last two words. In writing, since we can't supply voice emphasis, a word like "terrified," "horrified," or "petrified" would work much better, as would a recasting of the sentence to describe the action: "I scrambled desperately toward the house, picturing those fierce teeth sinking into my leg." The sentences are mostly short and simple (having only one independent clause and no dependent clauses), and while such sentences can be highly effective in describing action, their constant repetition can be like torture by dripping water. One way to check your sentence structures is by reading the paper aloud, exaggerating the pause after each sentence. Compare the sound of your own paper with the sound of one of the professional papers in your text. 1.6 (the lowest C) is my score for language on this paper.
Conventions / Format
The paper has several misspellings or typos that a spelling checker would catch. The writer has used sentence structures that need little if any punctuation, but she still leaves out commas or puts them where they don't belong. The one semicolon is inappropriately used. One apostrophe is missing, perhaps a typographical error. There are no errors that seriously interfere with meaning, but there is no evidence that the writer is well-versed in punctuation. The paper has no title. There is certainly nothing here to warrant an above average grade like a 3.0, but there is nothing to warrant a below average grade either. 2.2 seems a fair grade.
The average of the five grades (2.0, 1.0, 1.0, 1.6, 2.2) is 1.56 which I would round up to 1.6. The college's official decimal-to-letter grade legend follows.
Official Decimal-to-Letter Grade Legend
Decimal / Letter Grade / Decimal / Letter Grade3.8-4.0
3.5-3.7
3.2-3.4
2.9-3.1
2.6-2.8
2.3-2.5 / A
A-
B+
B
B-
C+ / 2.0-2.2
1.6-1.9
1.3-1.5
1.0-1.2
0.7-0.9
0.0-0.6 / C
C-
D+
D
D-
F