LOUISLADY 1
MIGGYLADY 2
CHRISTIAN
PROPS: bar counter, (2) filled glasses, small book, post-it note, pen, cell phone
CONTROL FREAK
Opening Scene: On the Street
(LOUIS and MIGGY are talking at the testimony platform. LOUIS has a book in hand.)
MIGGY: Everywhere you go, you always have that book with you. What’s that book about, Louis?
LOUIS: It’s a self-help book. It’s supposed to be quite helpful.
MIGGY: (taking it from LOUIS and reading the cover) Hmm; “How to Control Women.” What’s that all about, Louis?
LOUIS: (taking his book back and putting it in his pocket) It’s about using your personality to get women to like you and want to do things for you.
MIGGY: Have you tried it out yet?
LOUIS: No, not yet.
MIGGY: Do you think it could even work on total strangers?
LOUIS: I think so.
MIGGY: I’ve got to see this! Let’s go to the Wild Turkey Bar across the street.
LOUIS: Yeah, Miggy; that’s a good idea!
MIGGY: And if that book helps us pick up girls, then I’ll believe you. Deal?
LOUIS: Deal!
(LOUIS and MIGGY EXIT)
Scene Two: Wild Turkey Bar
(LADY 1 and LADY 2 are seated at a bar counter, acting like they are drinking, talking to each other and generally having a good time)
SCREEN SCENE: Inside of a Bar
MUSIC: Upbeat Music (just loud enough for atmosphere, but not loud enough to compete with the volume of the drama lines in this scene) “Tell Her About It” by Billy Joel would set the mood and even go with the theme of Scene Two as well.
(LOUIS and MIGGY ENTER)
MIGGY: Hey, Louis, check out thoseladies sitting at the bar right now!
LOUIS: I see.
MIGGY: I seems like every time we come here we always see them, but we never have the courage to talk to them.
LOUIS: But that’s all going to change.
MIGGY: I’m so nervous!
LOUIS: Don’t worry about a thing, Miggy. Everything is under control when you know what you’re doing.
MIGGY: They’re both so pretty – it makes me nervous just to be in the same room with them. Are there any pickup lines in that book?
LOUIS: Nah. Pickup lines are for amateurs. The book says to just focus on one lady, go right up to her, and tell her exactly how you feel. By the way, Miggy; how do you feel?
MIGGY: I still feel nervous! (getting pumped up) Okay . . . I can do this!
(MIGGY walks up to LADY 1 and speaks to her)
MIGGY: (shy) Hi!
LADY 1: (mildly curious) Hi.
MIGGY: I’ve seen you here quite often and I just have to tell you how I feel about you . . . just being near you . . . makes me feel like throwing up!
LADY 1: Huh! Well same to you, buddy!
(LADY 1 EXITS in a huff, very offended. MIGGY returns to LOUIS who was watching and listening to the action.)
MIGGY: It didn’t work.
LOUIS: Yeah. You know what, Miggy? That wasn’t exactly what I meant when I told you to tell her how you felt. Now watch me . . . and learn how to do this the right way.
(LOUIS confidently walks up to LADY 2)
LOUIS: Hey, baby.
LADY 2: Are you talking to me?
LOUIS: (trying to be smooth) Yes I am. You’re so fine . . . it makes me blind. How about a date?
LADY 2: Uh, let me check my calendar and get back with you. (handing LOUIS a sticky note and a pen) Give me your email address.
LOUIS: (writing quickly and handing the note and pen back to LADY 2) Here you go!
(LOUIS confidently saunters back to MIGGY)
MIGGY: What did she say?
LOUIS: She asked me for my email address.
MIGGY: Your email address? Wow! That’s very personal, Louis! It looks like you scored big time!
LOUIS: Like I said, everything is under control when you know what you’re doing.
(LOUIS opens his cell phone and checks his email account)
LOUIS: I knew it! She couldn’t wait to send me a message!
MIGGY: (looking on excitedly) What does it say? What does it say?
LOUIS: I don’t know yet, but the title of the email says, “LOSER.”
MIGGY: Loser?
LOUIS: Yeah. Maybe she just didn’t spell my name correctly. You know, Louis and loser have some of the same letters.
MIGGY: (still excited) Open up the message! What does it say?
LOUIS: It says, “Drop dead, loser!”
MIGGY: Let’s go.
(LOUIS and MIGGY EXIT)
Scene Three: On the Street Again
(MIGGY and LOUIS are standing on testimony platform)
MIGGY: (sarcastic) That’s a great book you’ve got there, Louis, just a great book!
LOUIS: (holding his book) Yeah . . . I think I’m going to return it to the library tomorrow. We both totally lost control of our situation in that bar.
(CHRISTIAN ENTERS, walking up to LOUIS and MIGGY)
CHRISTIAN: Hey, how’s it going?
MIGGY: Don’t ask and we won’t have to talk about it.
CHRISTIAN: That bad, huh?
MIGGY: My friend’s dumb book got us into a little bit of trouble at the Wild Turkey Bar.
CHRISTIAN: I see. Well, if you guys are looking for a little bit of action there’s always The Arena on 9th Street and 6th Avenue. They have Christian music, testimonies of changed lives, drama.
LOUIS: We definitely don’t need any more drama tonight.
MIGGY: We had some drama trying to pick up some ladies at the bar.
CHRISTIAN: It’s not that kind of drama. What’s that book about?
LOUIS: (sarcastic) It’s called, “How to Control Women.”
CHRISTIAN: I used to be a control freak myself. I had to be in control of everything! But one day somebody shared the Gospel of Jesus Christ with me, and I began to realize that I was better off letting God take control of my life. After all, since God is the one who created us, it just makes sense that he knows how we should live our lives even better than we do. The Bible says there is a way that seems right but in the end that way leads to death. But if we do things God’s way we will be blessed and God will take good care of us. Would you guys like to get saved and let God take control?
MIGGY: I would.
LOUIS: (still holding book) I know this sure isn’t working out for me. Maybe I should let God take control instead.
CHRISTIAN: Let’s pray.
(ALL THREE bow their heads in prayer)
THE END