Secondary Schools Mentoring Programme

Bishops’ High School

Tutorial High School

Report

on

Workshop for Parents

Bishops’ High School

Georgetown

Guyana

Saturday, April 8, 2006

Introduction

On Saturday, April 8, 2006, the first workshop for parents of Mentees from the Bishops’ High School (BHS) and Tutorial High School (THS) was held at the Bishops’ High School from 2.00 pm to 5.00 pm. It was attended by 18 parents from BHS and 15 parents from THS as well as the Headteacher from BHS. Of note is the fact that only three (3) fathers were present.

Ms. Magda Pollard, Chair of the Mentoring Management Committee, welcomed parents to the workshop. She noted that parents need to understand and identify their role in the Project. She pointed out that parents should be aware of the children’s views and requirements as they moved from primary to secondary school. She observed that parents must help the children to settle in to the new environment and should seek to influence their performance positively. Ms. Pollard then introduced the facilitator, Dr. Janice Jackson.

Dr. Jackson pointed out that parents need to understand their children. She reminded the parents that children have their own problems to cope with, and that parents have a responsibility to be available for the child. She also observed that children are psychologically astute, having taken time to assess parents and determine when and whom to approach to gain the best responses that best fulfill their needs and how to behave in different circumstances. She encouraged them to reflect on their own childhood to remember how they interacted with their own parents and their responses in different situations.

All participants were invited to mingle and introduce themselves. Initially, they were hesitant to interact with each other, particularly since they were meeting for the first time. However, they moved around the room from person to person and admitted that the activity helped them to become more comfortable. It was noted that people tend to wait for someone to give them permission to interact when they are in a new environment. The parents were encouraged to take responsibility for engendering their own comfort in such situations.

To give parents a better understanding of some challenges facing first form students, ten (10) mentees from BHS (seven girls and three boys) and six (6) from THS (five girls and one boy) were invited to prepare role-plays. They highlighted issues which are significant to them and which relate to both home and school. The issues raised by the students were discussed by the parents.

Perspectives of Students

At the students of the two schools performed role-plays which were enjoyed by the parents. They stimulated some parents to reflect on their own behaviour as evidenced by the expressions on some faces. The students also worked in mixed-school groups to write poems while the parents were in discussion. They performed these for the parents.

Role-play – Bishops’ High School

The students concentrated on the issue of school rules. The portrayed the result of lack of discipline by teachers and students in “An Other School” and compare this to the BHS where rules hold sway. They stressed how important it was to adhere to these rules as this helps to build and maintain a good social fabric.

Role-play – Tutorial High School

The students addressed a number of issues that affected them as children at home and at school. They presented these as a conversation.

The issues raised were:

The difference between primary and secondary school, for example:

A change from 4 to 12 subjects;

Coping with 12 teachers;

Homework demands; and

Difficulty in understanding some subjects;

Household chores vs. homework assignments;

Perception of being big children because of their age group and the need to be treated as such and not as young children;

Perception of being able to take care of oneself;

Problems of nonconformity with the norms of peer society and the teasing endured for being different;

Need for more parental interaction with the children, especially companionship and assistance with homework;

Spending of money and the popularity gained from that;

Dealing with new and different forms of punishment associated with secondary school, e.g., detention;

School rules and the need for parents to understand their extension to extra curricular activities, giving children a chance to participate fully in planned events;

AIDS and its complications;

Adequate lunch provisions.

Poems

CHILDREN

CChildren are the future of tomorrow

HHaving education they could build a better society

I Intelligent they are

LLearning what they have to do

DDreaming of achieving their highest goal

RRespectful they are to everyone

EEncouraging others to follow the right path

NNatively they make their country proud

FRIENDSHIP

FForgiving each other

RRespecting each other

IIn hard times always be there for each other

NNever betray them

DDaring to be kind to each other

SSomeone you can trust

HHelpful to each other

IIndeed we may have ups and downs

PPartners forever

Friendship is something special therefore you should treasure it

PARENTS

PProblem helper

AAlways there when you need them

RRespects one for who he is

EEnjoyable to be with

NNever lets you down

TTrustworthy

Ssomeone to rely on

PARENTS

Parents are loving, Parents are kind

A Parent is sometimes hard to find

Sometimes they can pay you no mind

When they have no time.

Parents sometimes make you life a misery

Especially when they get crazy

When they start to lecture

I would need a pillow protector

I thank God for them everyday

Because you’ve got to live with them anyway

The students were preferred to remain in same-school groups when tasked with writing poems. They were arranged in mixed-school groups and, as evidenced by the output, benefited from the experience. They exchanged contact information, a first step in building a relationship between students from different “school worlds” but with commonality of the reality of being a first form student.

Parents’ Perspectives

The parents were touched by the students’ candor and insightfulness. They acknowledged that children have many concerns of which they were unaware. Some noted that they must take the children’s views more seriously since they did not realize the challenges the children face.

The parents worked in four groups to discuss the issues arising from the role-plays and any observations they had made. The group reports which were presented in plenary follow.

Group A

Issues from the role-play

Homework vs. Housework

Children need to understand that doing housework would help to mould them into better adults. While children need to help at home, parents need to help them coordinate housework with other activities.

Pocket Money

Parents need to let children understand that while they would like to give them pocket money on a regular basis, family needs have to be prioritized. Expenses of the home and the requirements of school have to be accounted for first before any other could be considered.

Cell Phones

There are important for emergencies and had other uses. The other uses were not identified.

Other issues

The children are ‘burnt out’ by the time they enter secondary school and are not as productive as they ought to be.

Parents need to do something to help bridge the gap between primary and secondary school.

Parents should pay more attention to their children while allowing them to become independent.

Parents should communicate more with teachers to follow children’s progress.

Parents should get to know their children’s friends.

Parents should establish open communication with their children on various issues to help prepare them for adult life and make better decisions on their own.

Group B

Parents should have more patience and understanding when dealing with children at the preadolescent age.

The heads of some families are single parents who find it difficult to cope with their jobs, housework, children and their studies. Children are forced to be independent at an early age because of the responsibilities thrust upon them. One such parent welcomed the fact that the mentor would visit the home periodically and have an eye on the children during her absence.

Parents ought to be more interested in their children’s activities, both curricular and extra curricular. Parents need to learn and or participate in other activities themselves.

Parents should have discussions with their children, especially about events that took place during the day, whether or not they appear important to the parent.

Group C

What advice could be given to students entering secondary school having completed their primary education?

Why are students required to study 12 or 13 subjects?

Students of THS are not given the opportunity to study Mathematics and seem to do a minimal number of subjects.

Students are verbally abused at BHS.

There is a shortage of teachers, especially for core subjects.

Students are not graded fairly for their assignments and are not being assessed in the classroom.

Punishment of students in school.

There is need for clear communication between the school and the parent.

Examination scripts are not returned to students. If this were done, they could be used to help the children to improve.

Group D

Too much time is spent watching television rather than doing homework. There is need to control television time, especially when parents are absent. Parents should:

Monitor the programmes children view.

Let children say what they have learnt from the programmes they view.

Ensure that children watch the news.

Set a timetable of activities for the child.

Moving from primary to secondary school will like mean that the children will have different friends.

Discuss with the children their choice of friends.

Children may experience peer pressure. There is some concern about the influences and attitudes of peers on other weaker children.

Extra curricular activities, particularly sports, may help a child academically by:

Releasing stress;

Building self esteem;

Helping to build physical and mental strength; and

Generally helping the child to be a well-rounded personality.

Children sometimes feel pressure from peer to match their spending power.

Parents should encourage children to be thrifty as a method of circumventing this problem thus discouraging children from acquiring money by unacceptable means.

Parents should be actively involved in the child’s scholastic life.

Parents should oversee children at home, checking and assisting with schoolwork if they are capable of doing so.

Teachers need to mark books so the children could know how they are progressing.

Concluding Comments

Reflecting on the group reports, Dr. Jackson stressed the importance of parents making and finding time to spend with their children to talk, play or just be available for the child. She emphasized the need of discussing topics such as peer pressure, sex, minibus riding and the terms and expressions used. She noted that it not enough to wait until children raise issues with their parents to address them as, by the time this occurs, the children have already been exposed to the opinions of others; sometimes this is misinformation on which the children form their own opinions.

Dr. Jackson observed that parents should also work closely with the school. Rather than just attending meetings when summoned, parents should communicate with teachers with respect to the children’s behaviour and performance at school. They have a role to play in the children’s development both at home and at school. The parents reflecting on their life, behaviour and thoughts as adolescents could help them identify approaches to relating with their children.

Evaluation

Most parents found the session to be worthwhile and an “eye opener” to the problems children faced in school and at home. Parents saw the need to be punctual for meetings. They suggested that personal letters sent to the fathers were likely to encourage their attendance at sessions.

Parents agreed to the scheduling of the next Workshop which would allow them to interact with the mentors for Saturday, May 13, 2006 at 2 pm.