Leader’s Discussion Guide-- Communications

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Churchof theNazarene

Communications

SessionGoal:Toencourageparticipantsto communicatewithGodandtobeChristlikeinalltheir communications.

AreYouReady?

  • PrayforGod’s directionas youprepare for thesession.Pray thatparticipants willbe opento

God’s truthand beready toapply itto their lives.

  • Readtheentireleader’s guideforthis sessiontogetanoverview of thematerial.
  • ViewtheMor2Lifvideo,Communication.
  • BepreparedtoshowtheMor2Lif video,Communication.
  • Choose oneor twoquestions fromthe“SoWhat?” sectionas a follow-uptothevideoandanintro tothestudy.
  • DeterminewhichOption youwilluse fromthe“NowWhat?” sectionof thesession.
  • Bepreparedor enlist severalpeopletoread:Ephesians4:25-32andJames3:1-12.
  • Preparecopiesof theparticipant outline,Communication.

Introduction

Youhaveprobably heard thephrases:“Don’t lookat melikethat”or “Don’t roll your eyes atme,young lady.” Thosephrasesunderscorethefactthatcommunicationisshapedbybothverbalandnon-verbal clues. Infactcommunicationexpertssaythatonlyasmallpercentage(lessthan10percent)of whatis communicatedis verbalandso theoverwhelmingportion of communicationisnon-verbal(i.e.toneof voice,bodylanguage,facialexpressions).Sotheoldsayingis truethatactionsspeaklouderthanwords. Are youractionssupportingyourwords?

SoWhat?

Viewthevideo,Communication. Chooseoneor moreof thefollowingquestionsthatbestfitsthe needs/dynamicsof yourgroup.

  • What do youthinkaboutMelissa’s concernthathergroupis notreally listeningtoher?Fromyour perspectiveis sherightor wronginherstatement?
  • Whataresomewaysthattechnologymaycompromisegoodcommunication?
  • Describea timewhenyoufelt technologygotinthewayof communication.
  • Whataresomewaysinwhichtechnologycan beusedtoincreasecommunicationeffectiveness?
  • WhatdoyouthinkaboutthewayMelissacommunicatedherfrustration?Doyouthinkshewas effectiveinvoicingher concerns?
  • Whatotherwaysmight shehavecommunicatedherfrustrationwithoutmakingeveryone defensive?

WhatDoestheBibleSay?

Say,Weallknowthatthe communicationprocessis complex. Itisfarmorethanjustsayingwords.Have youheard thephrases:“Don’t lookat melikethat”or “Don’t roll youeyesatme,younglady.”Thetruthis thatyoucansayonethingwithyourlips andanotherthingwithyouractions,eyes,or posture.When words arenotsupportedbyappropriateactionsthecommunicationprocessis confused;trustand understandingarecompromised.TheBiblerecordsmanyinstancesinwhichcommunicationbrokedown becausethewordsandtheactionswerenotcomplementary.Inthis sessionwearegoingtofocusonwhat God’s Word has tosayconcerningourwordsandpatternsofcommunication.

Talk IsMore thanWords

Reador havesomeonereadEphesians4:25-32.

  • Inverses15 and 25, “speakingthetruth(inlove)”is commanded.What doyouthinkis meant by

thatphrase?

  • Canapersonspeaktruthwithoutlove? Discuss atimewhenthetruthwasspokentoyou “inlove”

anda time when“love”was notcommunicated clearly.

  • Whatdoyouthinkismeantby thephrases“unwholesometalk” and “helpfulforbuilding others up” (v.29)? Whatkind ofadjustmentsmayneedtobemadeinyour “talk”?Whataresomeways youcan“buildothers up”?
  • Remembercommunicationisbothverbalandnon-verbal.Howdo youthinkonecan“get rid of”

theungodlycharacteristicslistedinverse31?

TamingtheTongue

Reador havesomeonereadJames3:1-12.

Say,Although Jamesismainly addressingfalseteachers,theprincipleshe sets forthinthis passageare applicableto anybeliever’s speech.Jamesstresses theneedfortheheartandthetonguetobein alignment.

  • WhatconclusiondoyouthinkJamesis drawingbyusingtheanalogiesof “bits” and “rudder” and

“smallspark” whenspeaking of thetongue?

  • Whataretheconsequencesof anuntamedforestfire?Whatforestfires haveyouwitnessedthat were causedbythetongue?

HowDoesThisAffectMyLife?

WalkYourTalk

Say,Jesustaughtthatthecontentofyourheartwillultimatelybeexpressedthroughyourwords (Matthew12:33-37).Itmayseemanimpossibilityto controlthetongue.However,beassured—God givesrestraintthroughthepresenceandpowerof the HolySpiritinourlives.

  • Inthevideo,Jenniferwantsthegrouptoremainhonestandrealwhilebeingencouragingand edifying.Whataresomeissuesyourstudygroupmayneedtoaddressinorderto “speak the truthinlove”toeachother?
  • Consider thediscussionsandconversationswithin yourgroup.Howmightyou makethemmore

encouragingandedifying?

  • Consider yourconversationswithfriends,family, andco-workers.Are theylovinglytruthful?Are theyupliftingandsupportive?Whatchangesmightyou needtomaketoalign themwithGod’s Word?
  • Are your words mostly“praise” or mostly“cursing”? Howmightyour partners inChrist help yoube

accountableforyourwords?

NowWhat?

Say,Communicationis somuchmorethanjust words.Actions,attitudes,voiceinflection,facialexpression, andaudiblenoises(suchasasighoragiggle)areallcluestoourattemptstocommunicate.

  • Howhasthisstudyhelpedyoutorecognizethevariousfactorsthatcontributetoeffective communication?
  • Howhasthestudyof thesetwopassagesof Scripturechallengedyoutoexamineyour communicationskills, especiallyyourwords?

OptionOne

Askparticipantstoidentifyarelationshipintheirlifethatcouldbeimprovedbybettercommunication. Providesometimeforthemto think howtheymightimprovetheir communicationwiththatperson(s).Ask howthegroupcansupportthem.Giveapromiseto prayfor eachother.

OptionTwo

ReadPsalm19:14:“Maythewords of mymouthand themeditations ofmyheart be pleasing inyour sight,OLORD,myRock andmyRedeemer.”Challengethegrouptopraythewordsofthis Psalmeach dayduringthe coming week.Suggesttheywritethisversedownwheretheycansee itdaily.

Close thesessionwiththewordsof Psalm19:14asaprayer,prayingfor eachothertobebetter communicatorsthis week.