Just a Foster Kid

Just a foster kid

Just a foster kid,

Grown up in a home,

Where those who were meant to love denied, and those who were meant to hold me brought tears to my eyes.

And I grew, older and older,

I learnt, how to prosper, face, depend on myself, And win this race, called life But it wasn't just about winning, I know that now, but more about the journey of how far I've come, and how I'd make you proud.

And I didn't,

I didn't cause you didn't give me the chance, but I gave myself that chance, and now they give me the chance.

So that is my home, and they are my family, home is where the heart is, but now my heart lies with them, because they gave me that chance, When you didn't.

And I may just be a child, to many, and a foster kid to some.

But it doesn't matter, the label doesn't matter.

Not if I've got my mom.

And I was just a foster kid, I am one,

But before I was one, I was long gone.

A hole in my heart, the stitches breaking, a noose around my neck and whole body shaking.

And I didn't leave this earth, because I couldn't let them down.

All whilst not realising that they had let me down.

And I was foolish enough to stay for them, I mean I'm glad I stayed, but it should have been for something worth fighting for, and they were not worth fighting for.

I could handle the abuse, and the lies and neglection.

And it's sad to think I was never shown attention, or love, or care, or for them to always be there.

I needed them there, and they weren't.

When I wanted them they turned away,

And now they want me and want me to stay, But now I don't care, Now I'm smart enough to care for my family, my home, and my mum.

I'm smart enough to be a child, and to use that forced independence to my advantage, Cause of that thing I never had; love and care, And I must admit, I wish I didn't wait until I was 14, to get a grasp of it.

I may just be a foster kid, from a loveless home, but now I'm a kid, with a whole life to own.

And control.

To live with a women so firm, but fair.

And a heart of gold, to take me in, at 23 and raise both her child and a teen.

To be so lucky, to have someone, who not only wants to be a parent, but a parent to someone, someone like me.

And others, who may come from worse pasts than me.

And to take that chance, and invite me in her home, Is just enough to make me know, That I am lucky, she chose to have me, And like she promised she won't leave me.

Not like they left me,

So I admit it may be hard to be like me, just a foster kid, with no biological family.

And a heart that's scared, and used to being used, and a mind that knows she'll always be abused.

But I need to remind myself, as well as tell people so.

That we aren't hopeless little souls,

And shouldn't be identified that way.

cause we are not always broken, and we don't always need to be saved, We justneed someone, someone there to offer care and love.

And I was given that someone from someone above.

And I'm thankful for that.

Because they are my family, and I fit in, and the daily diaries and meetings may be annoying, but that's not important to me.

My Home is,and for that I am thankful,to be just a foster kid

Jessy Eliza. 15