St. Joseph's Roman Catholic Church

Gregory J. Bartus Esq.

Mass of Christian Burial

Monday 21 July 2008 10 AM

St. Joseph's Roman Catholic Church

43 Gebhardt Road

Penfield, NY

Summer in July

Here we are in the middle of the summer. While most people are enjoying picnics, family outings, and time at the beach or lake, we are here in church doing what we do as Roman Catholics when loved ones, like Gregg, die. At the same time, I don’t think there is anyone among us that wants to be here. I suspect that we did know that know one day we might have to bury Gregg, but this all seemed to come too soon. This truly is no fun and indeed no picnic. Matter of fact, it downright stinks.Gregg was supposed to stay around forever. Sickness is awful and death really sucks. This is not fair in the least.

Hopes & Dreams Eclipsed

All our hopes and dreams have been dashed. Death seems to have claimed a victory for itself and taken not only Gregg from our midst, but also eclipsed so many of the prospects of the future. Kelly you anticipated being with your husband for many years and enjoy building a family with Gregg and Allie, the fruit of your love. Allie will never have the joy that many of us have enjoyed having a daddy to play with her, sing her songs, hold her closely when life’s difficulties come her way. Sandy and Joe, as parents, in the natural order of things, Gregg should have buried you. This task you have to do today is a horrible reality. Now some might say that you and we knew Gregg was so sick and should have been prepared for his passing. While there may be some truth in that, there was no way and nothing that could have prepared his final moment of passing and death. His move from the nurturing hands of his family and friends to those of medical examiner and funeral home attendants seem to be so surreal. I know that many of you were just numb at the sight. Yet, we know that the night is the darkest right before the light of the new day bursts forth. That day came too soon for us.

Seeking Insight

We continue to be frozen at this time. At the Bartus house and funeral home, we wanted to say the right and comforting thing to Kelly, Allie, Sandy and Joe, Ted and Joan, and Joey, Will and Owen. Our words can appear so inadequate and, at times, trite. Perhaps, some words from our faith tradition and sacred scripture might offer us some solace and insight into what is all happening today. First, some insights from a 17th century Easter song and, secondly. from the sacred scriptures proclaimed this morning.

The Strife Is O’er, the Battle Done, Now the Song of Victory Can Be Sung

In the popular funeral hymn, “The Strife Is O’er, the Battle Done, Now the Song of Victory Can Be Sung,” we Roman Catholics acknowledge something significant when someone dies. How more poignant those words are for us this morning. The Strife is O’er, the Battle Done. These past few months seem like years. They have not been easy watching a vibrant engaging intelligent man become helplessly confined to a bed relinquishing all functions to his beloved wife, parents, family, hospice care, and friends.

Now the Song of Victory Can Be Sung?

This part of the song “Now the Song of Victory Can Be Sung!” is probably a bit more difficult for us to concede. Kelly, Sandy, and Joe, I suspect you are exhausted beyond belief and don’t have the energy to sing, no less a “song of victory,” but as Roman Catholics, sisters and brothers of the Lord, we have confidence that Gregg who waged the good fight now experiences the fulfillment of the promise of eternal life made to Gregg at his baptism. Wisdom makes this clear when the author says, “the just man, though he die early, is at rest.”

Greg’s Victory

Gregg was in no way a wimp in the face of his destruction. When he found out that the tumor, he fought hard and worked hard not to make sure the attention was not on him. Kelly & Shannon returned from Costa Rica only to find Gregg waiting for them at the airport with flowers and cake. Some might say it was his unwillingness to deal with this death sentence, but we know all of Gregg’s life was maximized to it potential. He was not going to let this opportunity pass him by to celebrate someone else, particularly Shannon who he needed if he were going to make the moves on Kelly.Wisdom goes onto say, an age“that is honorable comes not with the passing of time, nor can it be measured in terms of years…Having become perfect in a short while, he reached the fullness.” Hard for us to stomach, more so to truly believe, but perhaps we can take comfort in the vocation Gregg chose.

Vocation as a Lawyer

Gregg was not only a skilled lawyer. He was, as has been noted repeatedly by his family and colleagues at Monroe County’s Conflict Defenders Office, a compassionate attorney, which at times, in a professional life can, at times, be antithetical to one another. Let me pause from this reflection on his life as a lawyer to acknowledge the incredible generosities his partners at the Defenders Office offered during Gregg’s darkest days. May your generosity be rewarded a hundredfold! Back to Gregg. He used his intellectual acumen gained from his days of scholarship at Penfield High, Cornell University, and the University of San Diego, like St. Thomas More, to stand on the truth that the poor have rights and demand the same attention and care as any other human person.

Final Judgment and the Poor

This small insight into an overarching pattern of Gregg’s personal career is not unconnected to his victory. St. Vincent de Paul would often tell his followers that the poor would be our judges; they would be there “at the end” with St. Peter keeping guard over what Paul called “the judgment seat” vouching for us. Gregg’s mindfulness and attentive care of the poor, I am sure, made his transition into eternal life very easy. Jesus in John’s gospel made explicit that those who believe will have eternal life and be raised up. What a moment Thursday when Gregg heard the words “Come blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom of God!”

Wedding Homily Reminiscence

Many of us remember well as we gathered at Niagara University’s historic Alumni Chapel almost four years ago to joyfully celebrate Kelly and Gregg’s nuptial wedding. For some reason or another, I recall, despite the fact that it could be bloody hot in that chapel, there was a coolness, if you will. Not a frigidity, but a gentle breeze. I picked up on that a bit in my homily. In my reflection, I spoke about how really awesome it is to live so proximate to Niagara Falls where the Canadian and American falls roll speedily into the mist of the basin seemingly only to slow down mix together and bring some of the more magnificent floral and fauna that has ever been seen to the walls of the gorge. I used that analogy to describe Kelly and Gregg’s love and marriage, how the two of them are very strong personalities and came with some strong force to form a veritable indistinguishable union that would bring life and beauty to all their surroundings. We see that in the way that they have been a tour d’force in their years together vibrantly strong nourishing friends and friendly, although only to be eclipsed by this tragic death. Yet, their love brought forth Miss Allie, the apple of Kelly and Gregg’s eye.

How Does One Travel Alone?

Now that journey is one less. Do we chalk it up to “it was fun while it lasted?” I don’t think so. It is our sure and certain conviction that Greg who goes before us is now numbered among the saints, “the cloud of witnesses,” who intercede for us before God as we make our own life’s journey. Gregg, as in life, can be counted upon in death. He will the refreshing breeze, the brightest star in the sky, and the unfounded energy we never expected.

Between Then and Now

So, we do what has been done for some 2000 years. We read sacred scriptures in the hope that they will offer us some comfort and consolation. We gather around the Eucharistic table to break bread and drink wine, fully knowledgeable that Gregg joins us now from his place in heaven. This is a place where we least want to be in July, but a place where we need to be. The only place we know. The place that others will be for us when our time comes, but now it is our time for Gregg and we pray God that as you closed your eyes to the night, only to begin a new day with everything you yearned for and more.

Final Commendation

You know we love you Gregg. We said it often and, perhaps, your sickness help us refine and revel in that love more. We miss you more than you could imagine. Finally, we trust as you took such good care of this in life you will take care of us from eternal life. Remember us to the Lord and prepare a place for. And, until we meet again, may God hold you in the palm of God’s hand.