Key Program Topics to Include

in a Girls Empowerment Program

Conflict Management—

*Assertive vs. Aggressive vs. Passive

Relationships

*with boys/with other girls/with people in

authority (parents/teachers/future bosses)

MOTHER-DAUGHTER NIGHT

Empathy

*Service programs

Issues in Cyberspace

*Cyber-bullying

*Predators

*Handling the pressures of social media

*Sexting

*Laws regarding the use of the internet

Beauty/Fashion

*Distorted body image/eating disorders

*Role of the media in body image development

*Developing your own sense of beauty

Sexual Harassment/Violence

*Flirting vs. Harassment

*Avoiding victim blame

*Physical Self-defense

Careers/Career Planning

*expanding what “girl-jobs” are

*Guest speakers

*Planning for career/college/high school

Disney Princesses

What messages are we hearing?

Autobiographical Poem

I, Maddie,

Silly, Intelligent, Nice, Athletic,

Daughter of Tracy,

Lover of animals, music, and One Direction,

Who feels nervous, stressed, and sometimes joyful,

Who needs a good friend, less homework, and sleep,

Who fears walking home, spiders, and dating,

Who would like to see an end to drugs, Harry Styles, and my father,

Who is a resident of the hand of God,

Welcome you to my poem.

Re-claiming Sisterhood Case Study

Two girls charged in case of bullied Florida girl who committed suicide

Two girls, ages 12 and 14, have been charged with aggravated stalking for what a Florida sheriff described Tuesday as "maliciously harassing" a 12-year-old girl who jumped from a tower to her death.

The middle school students were booked into a juvenile detention center on Monday night and released to their parents under house arrest, Polk County Sheriff Grady Judd said.

Rebecca Sedwick, 12, jumped to her death from a third-story cement plant structure in central Florida on Sept. 10 after being verbally, physically and cyber bullied throughout 2012 and 2013, Judd said.

"She should be here. And she should be here to see justice getting served," her mother, Tricia Norman said. Rebecca Sedwick's mother says she jumped to her death after being terrorized online.

At a Tuesday news conference, Judd said investigators were in the midst of gathering information from social media sites about the bullies’ interactions with Sedwick, but a Facebook post by the 14-year-old which read, “yes I bullied Rebecca and she killed herself, but I don’t give a (expletive),” prompted Monday's arrests.

Judd said detectives arrested the 12-year-old, who was one of Sedwick’s “primary” bullies, because they decided, “We can’t leave her out there. Who else is she going to torment, who else is she going to harass?”

While bullying is not a crime, Judd said, the girls have been charged with aggravated stalking — a third-degree felony — because the victim was younger than 16 years old."We've lost sleep over that child dying needlessly. And we want to see things change," Judd said. In addition to the 14-year-old's Facebook confession, Judd said both girls made "incriminating statements" when they were arrested.

He said the girls’ case would proceed in the juvenile system and any punishment would depend on juvenile sanctions, adding, “it won’t be severe enough, in my estimation, for this conduct.”

Judd said the 14-year-old started to “torment” Sedwick in 2012 and according to a Polk County Sheriff’s statement, other children at the school also started bullying Sedwick to avoid being bullied themselves. The 12-year-old was Sedwick’s former “best friend,” Judd said.

Sedwick’s mother removed her daughter from the school, but the bullying continued online, where the 14-year-old wrote harassing insults, including that Sedwick should “kill herself” and “drink bleach and die,” Judd said.

“We believe that it certainly contributed to [Sedwick] jumping from the cement towers,” Judd said.

Re-claiming Sisterhood

Long-term effects of relational aggression

SECRET REGRET #1: I was pretty consistently bullied from nursery school on. When I was in 7th grade, (trying, I suppose to be one of the crowd) I threw a note at a pudgy, dirty, smelly girl who was avoided by everyone. The note read, "You stink." As it rolled across the lunch table, I was appalled at what I'd done. She read it with no change of expression. I never got up the courage to apologize. Several years later, she committed suicide, and it came out that she had been kept in awful conditions and been regularly beaten and sexually abused. I'll be 62 pretty soon, and I still think of her and how I added to her misery. Before that day, I'd always been one to stick up for the under dog, and I've been trying to make up for that one evil act ever since. Female, Age 61

SECRET REGRET #2: I regret not helping a girl who was being bullied, which I guess makes me a bully myself. Last year during school, I witnessed her get bullied to the point of sobbing, screaming and throwing things at the tormentors outside. None of us did anything. We just watched it go down. I had wanted to be her friend for a while, and I knew she had been bullied a lot before. I will always regret not trying to stop them, or for not trying to comfort her. I can't imagine having something like that happening to me with so many people watching, only to have them do nothing. I'm so sorry. Female, Age 15

SECRET REGRET #3: I regret having joined in with the crowd in tormenting you and bullying you in 7th grade. I was nice to you the first day and mercilessly mocked for it. It stopped me from being nice to you anymore. It is only now that I realize that you were being terribly abused at home, beaten by your father and witness to only God knows what. I regret not recognizing the signs that you were in trouble. I regret that you will never know how sorry I am. Female, Age 49

SECRET REGRET #4: I regret bullying this girl in my class because I was afraid I'd lose my best friend to her. I regret that I got suspended for it, that my parents were horrified, and that she never forgave me. She didn't deserve what I did to her. I am so sorry. Female, Age 21

SECRET REGRET #5: I regret telling my classmates that a mentally disabled girl should go jump in the dumpster because she was a piece of garbage. I wanted people to like me, and I've regretted saying that ever since. It hurts me every day. I hope she is doing well now because it breaks my heart just thinking of that moment. That was 8 years ago. Female, Age 22

SECRET REGRET #6: I regret turning being bullied into becoming a bully. I regret letting the girl who put gum in my hair on the bus so affect me that when I moved to a new school I became the tough one who used words and friendships and snide remarks and dirty looks make other girls feel bad about themselves. I regret that I didn’t allow girls to truly be my friends and that now I don’t even know how to have a girl friend. I regret not having stood up to that girl on the bus and I regret not having become a better person myself. Female, Age 46

SECRET REGRET #7:I regret having depression. I wake up everyday dreading getting out of bed. If I didn't have children to care for I would never get up. I think of taking my own life everyday. The feeling is so overwhelming that some days I just don't know if I'm going to make it. I hate feeling this way and I can't control it at all. I just feel so guilty about who I have been and how I acted when I was younger. I was so mean and such a bully. I made girls feel terrible about themselves and now I’m the one that gets to feel terrible every day. I want to go back to Middle School and do it all over again…I think I’d be a better person today. Female, Age 35

Relational Aggression

Where does it happen?

Everywhere. It is so sneaky and low key that it tends to be ignored by teachers and other adults.

Who uses relational aggression?

#1—girls with low self esteem

#2—girls who feel entitled

Why do girls use relational aggression?

--they’ve been bullied themselves and they are trying to make themselves feel better by making others feel bad

--they’re bored

--they want to feel powerful

--they want to belong and are afraid of rejection.

Negative effects on the person BEING bullied:

*increased depression

*lower grades

*increased anxiety and sadness

*more anger

*greater chance of eating disorders

*loneliness

Negative effects on the person who is DOING the bullying:

*increased drop out rate

*increased sense of guilt and worthlessness

*increased anxiety

*increased chance of drug/alcohol use

*greater chance of arrest and jail time

Resource Page

Dove Campaign for Beauty

One Billion Rising Campaign--One Billion Rising is the biggest mass action to end violence against women in human history.

#TeachHer Conversations--Women learning, teaching, changing the world in the classroom, on the field, in the lab and beyond.

Always—“Like a Girl” campaign

Sr. Michelle Kelly, SND

Mr. Scott Embacher