Dear new E&M freshers,
Congratulations on making your offer! E&M is the toughest course to get into at Oxford, and in the country, so you’ve done an incredible job in making it here. Surprisingly, this course has a much lower workload than you’d expect, giving you more time to get involved with extra-curricular activities. Get ready to realise what people mean when you hear the phrase ‘Easy and Manageable’ launched at you from science students who all secretly wished they’d picked this course over theirs. Get ready to spend the year helping PPEists on their Economics work as they complain that they do ‘two other real subjects’ whilst you get to enjoy the best faculty building in Oxford, the world-famous Saïd Business School. Here is some background info on us, the three current first year students at Christ Church:
Matthias – Matthias is the Rwandan prince that sends you all the “spam” emails about shipping gold. He’s actually not kidding. His IQ of 180 and an open university BA in Maths and Astrophysics allowed him to set up a Ponzi scheme which made loads of money. Now he can’t store all the gold in his tiny room in Christ Church anymore and wants to get rid of it. The girls love it though and he’s scoring higher than his appearance might suggest. Just wait till you see his girlfriend.
Jack – Jack has never seen the end of a BOP, due to his questionable drinking tactics. This faux-northerner will leave you perplexed with his use of the phrases ‘grimsby’ and ‘fair play Theresa May’. Known for his ability to somehow impress his tutors without having done any of the reading, Jack certainly has a way with words. He is famous in college for receiving the fewest votes ever for a JCR Committee position, so if you want any political advice, kindly avoid him.
Henning – Guten Abend. Henning, or as his parents call him, der Weißwurstsauger, is well known back in Germany for his prominence in the Berlin techno scene. A frequenter of Berghain, his precise, efficient dance moves leave no room for error. Henning has soared like the Luftwaffe at Oxford, having been crowned Chairman of the Oxford Student Foundation within his first two terms. A keen member of the ChCh football team, you can’t help but wonder whether he reminds you more of Özil, Götze, or Müller when he’s on the pitch.
We shall be meeting you at the start of Fresher’s week to give you tours of Oxford in our college family groups, as well as having you round to answer any course or Oxford related questions. Later, there will be a college family formal, as well as a subject drinks which will involve an establishment that you’ll become very familiar with over the course of the year….
We hope that you enjoy coming to Oxford, and remember to keep on top of your work, but don’t stress too much about it. The main purpose of first year is for you to settle in well and have fun!
Feel free to contact us before you arrive if you have any queries, you can either email us (use or ) or drop us a Facebook message.
We look forward to seeing you in October!
Best wishes,
Matthias, Jack, and Henning