Conquering Chemical Dependency
Step 7 – Ready For Change
“We humbly ask God to renew our minds so that our sinful patterns can be transformed into patterns of righteousness”
Romans 12:2 – “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect”
Introduction
-Julie finally understood steps 6 and 7
-She realized that she had been attempting to work to make herself acceptable to God, while the step said that “we desire that He” remove the pattern of sin from our lives
-Step 7 is not just about asking God to help us. That is the wrong question
-I need to let God do the work of cleaning me up
-I can “let go and let God”
The Grace Step
-Why do I need my mind renewed?
-As alcoholics or drug-users we think that we have it all together, that we are sharper than the rest
-But it just is not true, and our thinking has become distorted
-Sin damages everyone of us, and it causes this distorted thinking
-The damage sin has done to us, is described by the word depravity.
-God wants to renew our minds and transform our lives
-Satan wants us to stay the way we are
-John 8:44 says that Satan is the source of our behavior, and we naturally are like him - this is the source of our depravity
-Sin in our lives occurs as a result of our distorted belief system
-Most of the actions we take are habitual – we have learned to behave particular ways, based upon our beliefs
-This impacts our drinking and using – our beliefs are the source of our addiction
-Satan has deceived most of us to believe that “our self-worth = performance + others’ opinions
-This is expressed in 4 basic false beliefs
The performance trap
-1. I must meet certain standards in order to feel good about myself
-This results in fear of failure, perfectionism, being driven to succeed, manipulating others
-God’s answer is “justification” – we are completely forgiven and fully pleasing to God
-Results include freedom from the fear of failure, desire to pursue Jesus, love for Christ (Romans 5:1)
-Justification – Rom 3:19-24, Rom 4:4-5, Rom 5:1-11, Titus 2:11-14, Titus 3:4-7
The approval addict
-2. I must have the approval of certain others, to feel good about myself
-This results in fear of rejection, being a people-pleaser, overly sensitive to criticism, withdrawing from others to avoid disapproval
-God’s answer is “reconciliation” – we are totally accepted by God
-Results include increasing freedom from the fear of rejection, willingness to be open and vulnerable, ability to relax around others, willingness to take criticism, a desire to please God no matter what others think (2 Corinthians 5:18)
-Reconciliation – John 15:14-16, Rom 5:8-10, Eph 2:11-18
The blame game
-3. Those who fail are unworthy of love and deserve to be punished
-This results in fear of punishment, a tendency to punish others, blaming self and others for personal failure, withdrawing from God and fellow believers, being driven to avoid punishment
-God’s answer is “propitiation” – we have the capacity to love God deeply, because we no longer will fear punishment or punish others
-Results include increasing freedom from the fear of punishment, patience and kindness to others, being quick to forgive, deep love for Christ (1 John 2:2)
-Propitiation – Matt 18:21-35, Luke 7:36-50, Rom 3:25, Rom 8:1-8, Col 3:12-14, Heb 2:17
Shame
-4. I am what I am. I cannot change. I am hopeless.
-This results in feelings of shame, hopelessness, inferiority, inactivity, lack of interest, loss of creativity, isolation, withdrawing from others
-God’s answer is “regeneration” – we have been made brand-new, complete in Christ
-Results include no longer experiencing the pain of shame, Christ-centered self-confidence, joy, courage, peace, desire to know Christ (Colossians 1:21)
-Regeneration – 2 Cor 5:17, Gal 5:16-24, Eph 2:4-5, Eph 4:22-24, Col 3:15-17
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-These four basic truths are the basis of a Christ-honoring life
Conquering Chemical Dependency
Step 7 - DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
Name:
1. Why is it necessary that our minds be renewed? What things in your life show you that this is important? What ways of thinking have led you down the wrong path?
2. In what ways have you tried to gain a sense of self-worth through your performance? Is it wrong to try to perform to the very best of your ability? Why is performance a poor indicator of self-worth?
3. Describe the “fear of failure”. How have you allowed the fear of failure to affect your life? What is God’s answer to performance-based self-worth? Describe “justification” in your own words.
4. Describe the “fear of rejection”? In which ways have you been hurt by other people’s disapproval? What effects has the fear of rejection had in your life? What is God’s answer to the fear of rejection?
5. What are the effects of the fear of punishment? Why do we want to blame others? After sinning, do you feel a need to feel badly about yourself? What names do you call yourself when you have messed up? What is “propitiation”? Put this in your own words.
6. Describe shame. What false belief results from shame? Describe an incident when you experienced shame? What areas of your life have been affected by shame? What is God’s answer to shame? Describe what this means.