Christian:Welcome, to the Rapid Coaching Academy. How is everybody feeling tonight?
Participant:Good.
Participant:Hi Christian.
Christian:Let me ask you a different question, how great is everyone feeling tonight?
Participant:Fabulous.
Participant:Super great.
Christian:How amazingly wonderful is everyone feeling tonight. I’m asking different questions and all of a sudden those questions are picking up the energy on the call and making us all feel better and that’s going to be an example of a little preview of our call tonight. This is Rapid Coaching Academy session number nine, master your psychology part three questions. I’m not asking you for questions, that’s the subject of our session today.
Before we get in to the heart of the program, I just wanted to hear from you and hear about how things are going. I just wanted to check in and ask what is the best part about being in the Rapid Coaching Academy for you so far? What has been the best part?
Participant:For me it’s the triads, my buddies.
Christian:Why?
Participant:Opportunities to coach and be coached and get through stuff.
Christian:Great, great. Excellent. Thanks. Someone else? What are you finding to be the most valuable or best part about participating in the Rapid Coaching Academy program so far?
Participant:I find I really am enjoying the tools that you have provided in the program and knowing those tools has helped me with my confidence in coaching quite a bit so I’m very thankful for that.
Christian:Great. Thank you. Someone else? What’s the best part about participating in the Rapid Coaching Academy?
Participant:I wanted to say I’ve really enjoyed the releasing techniques and I’ve used them many times since we learned out to use the techniques and they’ve been wonderful.
Christian:Awesome. Awesome, awesome. Let’s go ahead and hear from one more person, what are you finding to be the best part of it so far? Someone else?
Participant:I just joined so I’m not sure what your question was.
Christian:The question was what are you finding to be the best part about the Rapid Coaching Academy so far?
Participant:I just have a sense of confidence. My own life is changing and I just feel confident about listening, listening, listening to other people and so I just feel new vigor in my life. I just have a confidence from it.
Christian:Yeah. Awesome. Thank you for sharing that. How about this, any challenges that anybody is facing in the coaching program in any way, shape or form right now whether it has to do with me or the program or your partners or anything? Anything that you are having a challenge with in terms of facilitating coaching, being coached, about the learning process, any part at all that you can think of, if anything? Silence, that’s a good thing.
Participant:I think for me the personal challenge is I’m juggling quite a few things outside of coaching, or at least the coaching class so I’m getting the information, it’s just going to take time for me to be able to absorb everything. There’s a lot of information in the course but I also found that the information is very useful.
Christian:Thanks, thanks for sharing that. Time is a factor for a lot of people. I’m going to recommend – I will post on the member’s only resource center, I’m going to put a little note to remind myself here, the first session of my time abundance program called free your time, free your life. I will add that so that this way everybody will get that. It’s an overview but it’s very, very powerful in and of itself. It will change your relationship time and your experience of life itself. In terms of teaching programs, Rapid Coaching Academy has been my favorite group that I have ever worked with. In terms of content, the most profound material I think I have ever created is the free your time, free our life program so I’ll definitely share that first call with you and all you have to do is find time to listen to it.
I just want to hear also any wins that anyone wants to share related to coaching, being coached, your coaching business, anything like that, any wins anyone would like to share?
Participant:I had an ah-ha moment quickly followed by a duh moment in terms of duh. I earlier this week decided instead of calling myself a life and relationship coach, I’m just going to call myself a communication coach. I have a master’s degree in communication why didn’t I think of that 10 months ago instead of just saying relationships. I’ve been focusing on the narrow niche of people who are married and I’ve been getting lots of interest from people in the corporate sector wanting help doing public speaking and wanting help with presenting their image both verbally and non-verbally to everyone that they work with co-workers, customers, etc. I finally said, I’m going to respond to this need out loud and expand my marketing and coaching practice to include all forms of communication so I’m pretty excited about that.
Christian:Good for you.
Participant:Thanks.
Christian:Awesome. High five over the phone.
Participant:Thanks.
Christian:Someone else? Anyone else who would like to share a win? Let’s hear from at least one more person, a big or a small win. How about in terms of being coached? Any big win as being the coachee? Boy, we have a quiet crowd today. That’s okay, I’m going to get you all talking a lot. In fact, that’s my intention for tonight’s call is to get everybody really participating in this because this discussion is going to be important. Okay, we’re going to jump right in to the heart of the program, Rapid Coaching Academy Session number nine, master your psychology part three, questions.
Actually, one last thing I want to check in with before we get in to that is our last session was on beliefs. Maybe if I ask a more specific question I’ll get better participation. On beliefs, we talked about beliefs, how did you guys do in terms of noticing the beliefs behind things that people were saying, whether they said it outright or whether it was beneath the surface? Or, even catching yourself in your own beliefs and then certainly within any of your coaching, how did that go? Did anybody notice that some of those limiting beliefs started sticking out like a sore thumb? Did you start noticing some of those things?
Participant:I’ve had an email conversation with a client back and forth. I mentioned last week about the client that had an empowering belief that has become a limiting belief. It’s become a very interesting back and forth set of emails.
Christian:How did it go?
Participant:We haven’t reached the bottom yet. I guess the empowering belief is still too strong.
Christian:Well, we can talk more about that either perhaps at the end of the call if you remember and we have time, or if you want to email me or maybe we can have a conversation about it? Or, maybe we should talk about it now since you talked about it last time. I guess one thing that I would recommend is that email coaching, and email conversations about anything that is deep or could potentially cause people to put up their defenses I would strongly urge against. Email communication can be very easy to misinterpret.
Participant:I agree.
Christian:I would just say this one thing focus on as much as you can connect in person, especially when it comes to conversations like that and that will probably help clear up some of the things. Just remember that we can do the best we can and like I said, sometimes things will take immediately and sometimes they need to sit in the crock pot for a while and marinate and then it sinks in. Then, sometimes people just aren’t going to change. Sometimes that thing that we see that they could change that we know and obviously can see that it is holding them back, it may not make any sense whatsoever, they just may not be ready to change, or willing to change or wanting to change that. Sometimes you just need to see the greater truth of the situation that we do the best we can and that’s all that we can do.
Participant:There has been another one that was quite interesting, it happened the last day or two and it has been a big, big shift. I have a client I am coaching both the man and woman, it’s a relationship issue. The man totally believes that his wife was thinking a certain way and it brought a whole bunch of feelings and it was just bad. He was asking himself a whole bunch of I call them bad questions, if you ask a bad question you get a bad answer.
Christian:Yeah. Good.
Participant:And it was building up, building up and building up. From that belief we managed to shift and just look at it from a different perspective and as soon as he said, “Yeah, I suppose she could be thinking that way and that’s why she is reacting like this, this and this.” All of a sudden all those feelings started residing, not disappearing but a big, big change.
Christian:Good, good, awesome. Good to hear that. Thank you for sharing that. That is a great segue since you started talking about questions. We’re going to jump in to the heart of the program here and I am going to lead you in gently or maybe even abruptly by kind of playing with everyone a little bit but we’re going to need a lot of participation. So, if everyone who is willing to participate and have fun tonight and learn a lot say yes.
Participant:Yes.
Participant:Yes.
Participant:Yes, I proved it.
Christian:Alright. The first question I have for you is – and actually, this is a question for you and I’d like you to think about the answer and then answer me. What do you love about yourself most? What do you love most about yourself? We need some answers. Is that a toughie? If you put it out online you’re going to seem like you’re not modest and conceited or something?
Participant:Really.
Christian:We’ll go ahead and drop that. We’ll keep this judgment free zone and just know that this is part of the exercise so don’t worry about what people think of your answer, you can rest that part of your mind. Who wants to be the brave person to go first?
Participant:I’m going to do it. I love my positive energy that I put forth?
Christian:And why do you love that part of you the most?
Participant:Because I get immediate feedback from people and I change people who are grumpy walking around and I am positive and they get up too. I like that, I get that immediate feedback.
Christian:Awesome. Good, someone else? What do you love most about yourself? Thank you for being brave. In fact, let’s give her a high five over the phone.
Participant:Thank you. That feels great. I appreciate it. Excellent.
Participant:I think I’d tack on to that from the positivity and add to that the balance between seriousness, intensity and a sense of humor.
Christian:Alright. And, why do you love that part of yourself the most?
Participant:Because it’s rare that I’ve come across that in any folks that I’ve known and it lends itself to success I think in the coaching arena where you can go from joking with somebody about something to okay, let’s drill down and get pretty serious here. It’s a real nice asset in that regard.
Christian:Yeah, great. Awesome. High five over the phone.
Participant:Thanks.
Christian:Okay. Good. Anyone else that wants to share? We have enough to keep moving on but anyone else that would like to share we’re more than happy to create the space for you to share it. This is a chance for you to really claim your power in some ways.
Participant:I really like my optimism and how I can see the good in pretty much any bad situation. There’s always something good that I can bring up.
Christian:Awesome. Thank you for sharing that. High five over the phone.
Participant:Thank you.
Participant:This is David.
Christian:Yes, go ahead David.
Participant:I was searching when you asked that question and the thing that came up for me was my love of learning.
Christian:Great. Cool. Now, I have a question for everyone but first of all let’s give David a high five. High fives for David. When I asked you to answer that question did you look at different things that you love about yourself and find like two or three, or four or five, or one or two or however many? Did you find more than just one and then have to decide between and ranking them to number one or did you just come up with one right off the top of your head and that was the one?
Participant:More than one and then rank them.
Christian:Okay.
Participant:Same here.
Participant:Yes, ditto.
Christian:Okay.
Participant:I had to search a long time for the one.
Christian:Okay, so I would like you to ask yourself that question more often. In fact, put it as your homework to ask yourself that question everyday this week between now and our next session. Are you up for that?
Participant:Yes.
Christian:Yeah, good. The reason I’m asking about the looking for more than one, if you looked for more than one or maybe you had to search and it was hard to find one and wherever you are at is totally fine but when you ask a question like that it starts directing your focus and your brain starts looking at all the things that you love about yourself which is a good thing. That’s a good question to ask.
I’m not going to say anything else about that or teach anything more about that, I’m going to ask another question right now that may rattle some cages for everybody on the call and maybe everybody who ever listens to the recording of this call. What is one thing that you admire about terrorists?
Participant:They’re dedicated.
Participant:That’s exactly what I was going to say.
Participant:Their conviction.
Christian:Conviction, yeah.
Participant:Extremely focused.
Christian:Yes. Any other answers?
Participant:They risk it all.
Christian:Yeah. As I think about this question and the answer about the question I actually feel some like, I don’t know if it is a sense of pride or like nobility, there’s almost a nobility that someone is willing to give up their life for something they believe so strongly in.
Participant:I think you hit the nail on the head, they have this strong belief system that they must have or they must follow, whatever or whoever it is.
Christian:Yeah. It’s a very intense, very strong belief system and that’s the power and maybe to a certain extent the danger of beliefs from last session. Beliefs can be so strong that people are not willing to let go of them, not willing to see other sides. But, on the flip side their convictions can be so strong that they are willing to die for what they believe in and there is definitely a nobility about that. Patrick Henry is famous for saying, “Give me liberty or give me death.” Believing so strongly in freedom. I don’t know obviously, I mean I really don’t know what the belief systems are of people who decide to commit acts of terrorism and not all of them do so with necessarily sacrificing their own lives, many of them sacrifice the lives of people that we would consider to be innocent people but certainly some people for sure.
I don’t know what all they believe and I am certainly not endorsing any behavior terrorist or otherwise but it’s pretty powerful when you start asking a question like that. Instead of terrorist being this group of evil people it becomes this group of human beings. Did anyone else experience that shift when we started thinking about that?
Participant:I can also apply this to gangs for instance because I think there’s definitely a center of some sort, a nurturing center and then it sort of spreads out and spreads out to other people especially if the belief is very strong [inaudible 22:42] attracted in to their circle.
Christian:Okay, yeah. Very much, sure. Tests of courage, rites of passage, there are a lot of primal stuff probably that draws peoples to gangs and definitely belief systems and loyalty. There are definitely things that we can admire, if you really take the time to think about it, there are things that we can admire about just about anyone.
Participant:You can take that mentality about gangs and apply it to terrorists certainly.
Christian:Sure.
Participant:You can apply the focus or strength required to breaking family rules to be the one in the family that believes strongly enough in something to be different than everyone else in the family. That can take tremendous courage.
Christian:Absolutely. I haven’t seen the movie, I’ve only seen the preview for Freedom Writers but it seems like that kind of thing. This teacher goes in to an underprivileged area of town and becomes a teacher in a school that is riddled with gangs, violence and all sorts of stuff and teaches people to break out of that. Okay, I already asked you this question or something similar to it – well, actually maybe not, I don’t think I did ask this question. Let me ask you this one, what do you enjoy most about the Rapid Coaching Academy? Okay, my feelings are starting to get hurt here.