PEOPLE
A mnemonic relating to the major kines of non-verbal communication
P-posture and gesture; are you slumped or upright, standing to attention or relaxed? Do you wave your arms around like Magnus Pyke or do you look as though you are wearing a straight jacket? (Cliché.. “he was flapping”)
E-eye contact; do you make or avoid eye contact? Are you engaged in a staring match? How long can you normally keep eye contact before someone gets uncomfortable? (Cliché… “she wouldn’t look me in the eye and say it”…I think we see eye to eye on that”) POINT: NOT ALL CULTURES HAVE THIS APPROACH,THIS IS A WESTERN/EUROPEAN VIEW….MANY WEST AFRICAN CULTURES VIEW ANY EYE CONTACT AS AGGRESSIVE
O-orientation; where are you orientated in relation to the other party? Are you sitting and they are standing? Are you confrontational across a large table or beside each other sharing notes? (Cliché… “I’m beside you all the way”)
P-proximity; how close are you to the other party? Are you invading their personal space? (Cliché… “I wouldn’t touch him with a barge pole”.. “keep them at arms length)
AGAIN POINT OUT THAT PROXIMITY HAS CULTURAL DIFFERENCES, EG THE JAPANESE DON’T TEND TO GET CLOSE UP WHEREAS WESTERNERS ARE MORE LIKELY TO DO SO.
L-Looks (things you can’t change easily such as skin colour, hair colour, height, weight, visible distinguishing features)
Appearance-(things you can change quite easily such as hair style, facial hair, grooming, clothes)
Smell-1. not enough deodorant…too much cheap aftershave/scent
2. Environmental smell.. what does the House Doctor advise if you want to sell your house?…the smell of fresh coffee brewing or bread baking.
Cliché…the person who goes for a job interview looking like they have just fallen out of bed and responds to the question “Do you always go to interviews looking like that?” with the line “What you see is what you get”….guess what they get…shown the door
E-Expressions of emotion; Expressing emotions non verbally ranges from smiling, through crying/choking down a sob, to fidgeting. The most obvious Expressions of emotion are smiles and frowns but other non verbal means exist..eg
“Non Verbal Leakage” is the phrase that is given to relate to fidgeting (particularly fingers and feet) that gives away nerves or boredom. Cliché…(twiddle your thumbs and ask the delegates what emotion you are expressing)
LIGHT HEARTED POINT: IS THE INCREASED POPULARITY OF BOTOX LIKELY TO AFFECT FACIAL EXPRESSIONS?
Russell Slater