Nonverbal Signals And Negotiating Interactions

NONVERBAL SIGNALS AND NEGOTIATING INTERACTIONS

By

Charles B. Craver

Nonverbal communication, which is one of the most significant sources of information available to negotiators, is often overlooked. The negotiating parties tend to concentrate on what is being verbally communicated, and they fail to appreciate the information being nonverbally displayed. This is especially true when opponents are talking, but it is even true when these persons are speaking. Since most individuals find it easier to be less than forthright verbally than nonverbally, people who fail to observe opponent nonverbal signs are likely to miss the most trustworthy messages being communicated by their adversaries. Certain nonverbal signals may also suggest that accompanying verbal messages are deceitful. While no one signal is a conclusive indication of deception, observers who look for relevant nonverbal patterns and changes can learn to spot likely prevarication.

Skilled negotiators need to appreciate the importance of nonverbal signals. They should occasionally read books on this critical subject and watch body language being communicated by others in different settings. The more attuned negotiators are to these subtle messages, the more they will appreciate the actual feelings of the people with whom they interact. Recognizing that it is difficult to simultaneously speak and watch the nonverbal responses of others, many negotiators take colleagues with them to look for such signals while they are talking.

It would be impossible to cover the many nonverbal signals explored in the many excellent books devoted to nonverbal communication, but it would be helpful to focus on a few to introduce readers the this critical topic. Once people begin to appreciate the importance of reading nonverbal signals, they may be induced to peruse several of these books in an effort to become more adept at reading such signs.

COMMON NONVERBAL SIGNALS

1. Facial Expressions

Facial expressions are the most easily manipulated forms of nonverbal communication for most persons, yet subtle clues to the actual feelings of the signalers can often be perceived by careful observers. Taut lips may indicate frustration or anxiety. A subtle smile, often hidden quickly by a bowed head, or brief signs of relief around the

corners of opponent mouths when new offers are made, may indicate that the offeror has approached or entered the other side’s settlement range.

2. Flinch

A flinch may be an uncontrolled response to an inadequate offer or concession. This may sincerely indicate the unacceptable nature of the offer being conveyed. On the other hand, manipulative negotiators may employ a contrived “flinch” to silently challenge the adequacy of opponent opening offers or concessions. Negotiators who encounter what they consider to be truly reactive flinches should decide if their announced positions are clearly unacceptable. On the other hand, negotiators who think opponents are using disingenuous flinches to induce them to bid against themselves with consecutive position changes should: (1) recognize the manipulative nature of their opponents and (2) be careful not to change positions until they have obtained position changes from their adversaries.

3. Wringing of Hands

This is frequently a sign of frustration or tension. Distraught individuals often twist their hands and fingers into seemingly painful contortions. This signal usually emanates from persons who are anxious regarding aggressive tactics being employed by opponents or about wholly unsatisfactory negotiation developments.

4. Tightly Gripping Arm Rests/Drumming Fingers on Table

Impatient or frustrated persons frequently grip the arm rests of their chairs tightly or drum their fingers on the table. Negotiators who exhibit such behavior are most likely displeased by the lack of progress they think is occurring.

5. Biting Lower Lip/Running Fingers Through Hair

These signals usually indicate stress or frustration. They emanate from persons who are disappointed by the lack of negotiation progress and/or their perceived opponent intransigence.

6. Eyes Wandering/Looking at Watch

These are signs of boredom and disinterest. Such signals would suggest a serious lack of interest in what is being said. Negotiators who encounter such signs should ask their opponents questions to force them to become more involved in the substantive discussions.

7. Sitting on the Edge of One’s Chair

This is a definite sign of interest. When it follows a newly articulated position, it suggests real interest in what is being offered. Most people do not sit on the actual front of their chair, but only lean slightly forward. On the other hand, some individuals may lean so far forward they place their elbows on the table in front of them.

8. Hands Touching Face/Stroking Chin/Playing with Glasses

These are signs of contemplation. Individuals feel uncomfortable sitting in silence while they consider unanticipated opponent disclosures or position changes. To cover their pregnant pauses, the actors use these devices to look as if something is actually happening while they contemplate their next moves. Such actors are likely to reject the offers that generated such nonverbal responses, but they will probably do so more positively to keep the process moving.

9. Steepling (Hands Pressed Together with Hands or Fingers Pointed Upward)

This is a sign of confidence, suggesting that the actors are pleased with developments. Negotiators who observe such signals should be careful not to concede more than they have to.

10. Leaning Back with Hands Behind Head

This particularly masculine posture is another sign of confidence. It may alternatively be an indication of contentedness. The actors are very pleased with negotiation developments. When men are interacting with women, it can also be a sign of domination. Female negotiators who observe such behavior in opponents should be cautious, because their opponents probably think things are going their way.

11. Placing One Hand Behind Head

When individuals use one hand to clasp the neck behind their ears, this is usually an indication of distress. It is as if the actors are psychologically giving themselves consoling hugs to counteract the negative consequences they are experiencing. Negotiators exhibiting this posture most likely see negative developments ahead.

12. Open/Uplifted Hands with Palms Facing Out

This posture is used to indicate the sincerity of what is being verbally communicated. It is frequently associated with “final offers” to demonstrate that the offeror has nothing more to concede. If the signal seems insincere, it is most likely a deliberate attempt to deceive opponents.

13. Crossed Arms/Crossed Legs

This may be an aggressive, adversarial posture or a defensive position, depending on the particular position of the arms and legs. If the arms are folded high on the chest and one leg is crossed with one ankle on the knee of the other, this tends to be a combative posture. On the other hand, if the arms are folded low on the chest and one leg is draped over the other, it is a more defensive posture. In both cases, however, these tend to be unreceptive positions. If opponents begin bargaining interactions in such positions, it can be beneficial to take the time to establish sufficient rapport to induce them to become more receptive to what is being discussed.

14. Covering and Rubbing One Eye

This is a nonverbal sign of disbelief. It is the nonverbal equivalent of the disbelieving expression “my eye.” Negotiators who encounter this posture when they are making critical representations should recognize the possibility their statements are not being accorded much respect. They may have to restate their communications in a more credible manner.

NONVERBAL SIGNS OF DECEPTION

In his classic book Telling Lies (1992 Norton), Paul Ekman noted that people are especially inept at determining from nonverbal signals when they are being lied to. Some of this is due to the fact that dishonesty can range from mere puffing to unequivocal deceit. Despite the fact that no particular nonverbal sign is a certain indication of deception, there are some signals that should cause observers to become suspicious. Some reflect the stress usually associated with lying, while others are deliberately employed by speakers to enhance the credibility of the misrepresentations they are about to utter.

1. Increase/Decrease in Statement Specificity

When individuals tell the truth, they fill in little details as they are recalled. When people lie, however, there are no actual details to remember. As a result, they often omit the usual amplifying details, articulating the bare bones of their fabrication. On the other hand, carefully prepared liars may provide an excessive amount of information designed to make their fabrications appear more credible. Specific questions can be used to force minimal detail liars to fill in details they don’t really know or to discover whether detailed statements are really accurate.

2. Increased/Decreased Gross Body Movement

When individuals interact, they move their arms, legs, and torso regularly. They rarely sit perfectly still. Under stressful situations, some persons become more fidgety and move their arms and legs at an increased rate. Deceitful people who are afraid of getting caught may exhibit similar movement. On the other hand, some fabricators deliberately minimize their body movements in an effort to appear more trustworthy. As a result, negotiators should be on guard when they evaluate the veracity of statements emanating from individuals who have clearly increased or decreased their gross body movements.

3. Placing Hand Over Mouth

Most persons believe that lying is morally wrong. Their consciences bother them when they deceive others. Psychologists have noticed that liars frequently place their hands over their mouths when they speak, as if they are subconsciously trying to hold in the lies they know are morally reprehensible.

4. Eyes Looking Up to Wrong Side

When people try to recall past circumstances from memory, right handed individuals tend to look up and to the left and left handed persons tend to look up and to the right. On the other hand, when individuals try to create new images, right handed persons tend to look up and to the right and left handed people look up and to the left. When right handed negotiators look up and to the right or left handed negotiators look up and to the left, this may suggest that they are not trying to recall actual circumstances but are instead creating false stories.

5. Dilated Pupils/More Frequent Blinking

When persons experience stress, the pupils of their eyes widen and their rate of blinking increases. Although negotiators rarely interact with others in such proximity that they can see the size of their pupils, they can easily notice increased blinking. This may be due to foreign matter that has entered the eyes of such people, or it may be due to stress associated with deception.

6. Narrowing/Tightening of Margin of Lips

Stress often causes individuals to briefly narrow and tighten the red margin of their lips just before they speak. Careful observers may be able to see the lips of prospective speakers tighten into a narrow line across their lips just before they utter false statements.

7. Elevated Voice Pitch

Persons experiencing anxiety frequently raise their voice pitch when they speak. Even though experienced prevaricators work to control their voice when they talk, listeners can often discern their increase in voice pitch.

8. More Deliberate/Rapid Speech

Individuals who experience stress when they lie may speak more rapidly. On the other hand, persons who wish to have their misrepresentations completely heard may speak more slowly.

9. Increased Speech Errors

Many persons who try to deceive others have a greater number of speech errors. They may stutter, repeat phrases, or trail off without finishing their statements. They may also include nonsubstantive modifiers like “you know” or “don’t you think.” It is as if their conscience is disrupting the communication between their brain and their mouth to prevent the prevarication.

10. More Frequent Clearing of Throat

The tension associated with lying may cause speakers to engage in more throat clearing. As they prepare to utter their false statements, they nervously clear their throats.

If after reading this you go home and ask your spouse or significant other if he/she loves you and that person increases or decreases their gross body movement, places their hand over their mouth, blinks more rapidly, speaks with an elevated voice pitch, and speaks more deliberately or more rapidly, your relationship is probably in deep trouble!

Charles B. Craver is the Freda H. Alverson Professor at the George Washington University Law School. He is the author of Effective Legal Negotiation and Settlement (5th ed. 2005 LEXIS) and The Intelligent Negotiator (2002 Prima/Crown), and coauthor of Alternative Dispute Resolution: The Advocate’s Perspective (3rd ed. 2006 LEXIS). Over the past thirty years, he has taught negotiation skills to over 75,000 attorneys throughout the United States and in Canada, Mexico, Puerto Rico, Austria, England, Germany, and China. He can be reached at

Copyright ? 2007 Charles B. Craver